Episode 149

Episode #144 - Filling Your Spirit With Grit & Grace: An Interview With Sara Bohling

Imagine yourself being able to overcome the odds throughout your entire life. Would you be as successful as someone that was born prematurely, suffered a terrible tragedy in your sports career, or even repurpose your life to live with more intentionality with time and helping others to see the best within themselves? Today's guest, Sara Bohling, Owner of Cedar Wellness & Coaching, has done this and much more. With her unique background as a nurse, she shares what it means to live within the "margin" of our lives, and how we can start to capitalize on those moments that are too precious to lose, and to end the self-defeating habits and tendencies that we wrap ourselves into. Not only will you walk away with more tools and understanding from this conversation, but your mindset will focus on what ways you can be more effective with what you are given every single day in a whole new way.

Guest Bio

Sara's life is filled with stories of challenge and triumph….starting from day one. She was born very premature in the 1980s, with a very small chance of survival- but here she is! She became a high level competitive gymnast and endured a career-ending accident as a teen. Sara then went to nursing school and became a NICU nurse, working alongside the same nurses that cared for her as a baby. She is married, has 2 teen daughters, and a sweet golden retriever named Remi. She wrote a book about her journey called, "When Grit & Grace Collide: Persevering Through Life’s Challenges with Grit & God’s Grace.", and have started her own business called Cedar Wellness & Coaching. Sara is passionate about creating an authentic, grace-filled life for herself and her family, which flows right into her work with clients.

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Intro/Outro By: Michael Dugan, Podcast Host: Voice4Chefs

Transcript
Intro:

Welcome to the podcast where relationships, confidence, and

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determination all converge into

an amazing, heartfelt experience.

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This is Speaking From The Heart.

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Joshua: Welcome back to episode

number 144 of Speaking from the Heart.

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Today, we have Sara Bohling as our

guest, and Sara's life is filled

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with stories of challenge and

triumph, starting from day one.

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She was born very premature in the

:

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survival, but here she is, being a

guest on Speaking From the Heart.

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She became a high level competitive

gymnast and endured a career

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ending accident as a teen.

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Sara then went on to nursing

school and became an NICU nurse,

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working alongside the same nurses

that cared for her as a baby.

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She is married, has two teen daughters,

and a sweet golden retriever named Remi.

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She wrote a book about her journey

called When Grit and Grace Collide:

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Persevering Through Life's Challenges

with Grit and God's Grace, and has

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started her own business called

Cedar Wellness and Coaching.

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Sara's passion about creating an

authentic, grace filled life for herself

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and her family, which flows right into

her work with her clients, and I have to

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say, for somebody that has been through

so many different types of situations,

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especially throughout her life, to get

to where she is today, it has to give

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you a lot of battle marks; stitches, if

you will, and I think that we even hear

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a lot about that in her story today, when

she shares about her perspectives, even

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throughout her whole entire life, and

how that has fundamentally changed the

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trajectory, let alone, why she became a

nurse in the first place, but the most

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important thing to even take away from

this, which I think that you're going to

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get right away, is that it's about that

work and life balance; the things that

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are really played up to be important,

but when you boil it down into realistic

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tendencies, it's not so easy as you think.

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With a variety of different demands and

assessments that we all need to have

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in life, just keep in mind that when

you hear Sara's story today, and why

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she keeps pursuing to help others, it's

about taking care of yourself and others.

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That is the margin that we need to meet.

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But with that, let's go to the episode.

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All right.

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We're here with Sara Bohling.

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Sara, thanks for sharing

your heart with us today.

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Sara: You're welcome.

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Thanks for inviting me.

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Happy to be here.

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Joshua: Yes.

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I'm happy that you are here too, and

I appreciate you taking some time to

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not only share your background, but

also give our listeners an interesting

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perspective, because I feel that your

story, as I have already given to our

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listeners, might be of not only tragedy,

but of redemption, and I feel like

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there's a lot of redemption with this and

overcoming the odds, so I actually want

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to start with that, because I already

mentioned that you were a competitive

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gymnast, and you had this accident that

happened to you, so I was wondering if

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you can dive into what exactly happened.

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Sara: Yeah, absolutely, so I started

gymnastics when I was five years old.

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The teacher at recess called my parents

one day and said, "You need to get her

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into gymnastics training before she

hurts herself, because she's walking

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along the top of the monkey bars.",

so I started gymnastics training and

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was really naturally talented in it.

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I excelled very quickly,

joined the competitive team.

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We did some traveling, and I

was doing gymnastics four hours

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a night, five days a week.

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It was like a part time

job, and I loved it.

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I really enjoyed the challenge.

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It kept my body healthy; all those

kind of things, and one day I was at

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a competition, and I was warming up,

and I was on the vault, and I was

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running down the runway to jump from the

springboard onto the vault, and my steps

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got off, and if you are a gymnast, or

you know a gymnast, you know it's very

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important that your steps are the same

pattern and the right distance apart.

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Well, my steps got off and

that was a cascade of events.

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I didn't hit the springboard in the

right spot, so my hands didn't go

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on the volt in the right spot, which

caused me to not rotate my body

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enough times to land on my feet, so I

landed on my head, instead of my feet.

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Joshua: Yikes.

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Sara: Yeah.

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No good.

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No good; in front of the whole audience.

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The whole audience was watching this

whole spectacle unfold, so yeah, I

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ended up breaking my neck in a couple

of different places, and at that

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time, thankfully I had, because I was

a gymnast, a lot of muscle mass in

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my neck, which really helped protect

those bones and my spinal cord.

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I did not have any paralysis

or anything like that, which is

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really an incredible blessing.

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Someone in our area, she was a

cheerleader at our local college.

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She had the same injury the year

before, and she was paralyzed from the

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neck down from that injury, so when

I heard that that was the injury that

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I had, I got really scared, because

I knew what had happened to her, but

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thankfully, God was watching over

me, and I had protection that that

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was not going to be part of my story.

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Joshua: I noticed too that you were

actually born very premature, so

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taking this a few steps back, I find

it interesting that you were able to

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be a gymnast, be able to compete at

a high level, and then this accident

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happened, but may I ask a little bit

about why you were born very premature?

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Was there complications during

the pregnancy with your mom?

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Sara: Sure, absolutely.

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Yeah, so I was born in the

eighties, and in the eighties,

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there was not a lot of technology

and advances for premature babies.

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If you were born more than

eight weeks early or so, it

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was hard for you to survive.

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They didn't have the ventilators,

the breathing, the medications,

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all those kinds of things, so I

was born at 24 weeks, which is

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like six months of pregnancy.

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Joshua: Wow.

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That is very premature.

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Sara: Yes.

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I weighed two pounds and two ounces

when I was born, and my mom just

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went into labor early, and at the

time, the doctors were like, "No.

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I don't think it's labor.

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I just think you're constipated

or something like that.", and they

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weren't really taking her very

seriously until it was too late, and

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when you're in labor, once you pass

a certain point, you can't go back.

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You can't stop it, so yep,

we had passed that point.

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Literally, yes, from day one, I had

some uphill challenges, and have been

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trying to rise above all of them.

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Joshua: Yeah.

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I was going to say, that's why I

brought it up too, because you not

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only had to overcome the challenges

of being premature, but you also

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had to deal with not only the

accident that you had as a gymnast.

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I'm curious, was there anything

else that might have happened

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while you were growing up too?

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Sara: I had a lot of stitches

when I was growing up.

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For being a gymnast, I

was rather accident prone.

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My grandma always said, "You're the most

ungraceful gymnast I've ever known."

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Joshua: Well, maybe grandma knew

that you were going to be destined

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for better things, so thanks

grandma for helping Sara out.

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Sara: I love grandma.

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Yes.

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I was always tripping on the

playground, and getting stitches

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on my chin, or something like that.

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I think I had stitches 10 times

before I was 10 years old.

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It was just kind of crazy, but nothing

else dramatic between being born

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premature and the gymnastics accident.

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Joshua: You had these two

related medical things.

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You were being stitched up all the time.

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Sara: Yes.

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Joshua: It makes perfect sense to me why

you entered the nursing field, so it all

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comes together for me, but I really am

curious, other than maybe the obvious.

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Is there a real motivation as to why

you decided to go to nursing school

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after you were done with high school?

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Was there something that you were looking

to do to be able to achieve with becoming

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a nurse and helping those that maybe the

doctors and even other people as patients?

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Sara: Right.

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I really just wanted to help other people.

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My mom was in the medical field, and I

was really drawn to the science classes

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in high school, and I just thought it

would be a great career, a compassionate

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career of serving others, and once I

started nursing school, I actually got

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to do some shadowing in the NICU, and

only a few nursing students get to

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do that, and I was one of them, and

everyone else in my group said it was

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so boring and it was so quiet, and how

could you ever work here, and I was sold.

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I'm like, "This is amazing.

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I love this place.", and knowing that

I was a premature baby myself, so I

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was really drawn to the NICU, so that's

where I spent the first major portion

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of my nursing career is in the NICU,

and I actually got to work in the same

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NICU that I was a baby in, and I worked

alongside the nurses that took care of me.

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Joshua: And the NICU, that would stand

for, for my listeners, the Neonatal-

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Sara: Intensive Care Unit.

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Joshua: Yeah, that's what I want to make

sure of because I know a few people that

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are close to me that have also had their

children through the NICU, and my mom,

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ironically, didn't work in that, but she

worked in the nursing field as an LPN,

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a licensed practical nurse, at a nursing

care facility for many years, and she did

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that; get this, Sara, when she was in her

50s, and went back to school and did that.

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I was so proud of my mom.

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Sara: Amazing.

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Joshua: Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Go grandma, and go mom, so there we go.

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Sara: Good examples for us, ladies.

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Joshua: Yeah.

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I know you said too that you also

worked in the same place where you

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were taking care of in the NICU.

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Did that bring back any sort of memories?

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Did that really help you to kind of

feel like you were at home, and also

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helping these other people, because

you had that association of growing up?

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Do you think you were a better nurse

as a result of those experiences?

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Sara: Hmm.

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I think it helped give me an innate

connection to the babies and the families.

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Obviously, I don't remember being in

the NICU because I was a tiny baby,

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but I remember my parents talking about

the stresses of being in the NICU,

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and working in the NICU, and watching

how much these nurses care for the

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babies that they are responsible for.

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It really opened my heart even wider

to providing the best care for these

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families, because they're in, arguably,

the scariest time of their life,

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and they're trusting you with the

life of their child, so absolutely.

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We had really tender, vulnerable

moments and conversations every

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day while I was working in NICU.

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Joshua: Do you think that technology

has come a long way since the:

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because I was also an eighties

child myself, and more of the late

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eighties, mind you, so I always joke,

and I'm sure you've heard this joke.

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too.

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I'm a Cold War baby, so I

made it through the Cold War.

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Sorry, for my Gen Zers, you have

no idea what I'm talking about.

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That shows how old I am at this point,

but I'm kind of curious, all joking

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aside, do you feel like technology has

helped the medical field to be able to

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take care of these sort of situations,

or do you think that there's still some

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work to be done, from your opinion?

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Sara: 1000%.

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There are countless babies that

are alive today, that would not

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have been alive then, because

of the advances in technology.

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Sometimes, to be honest, I feel like we

try to save babies that are too early,

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and we are causing them more pain than

harm, because technology has gone so

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far, it's like we are trying to push that

envelope farther, and unfortunately, there

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comes a point when it's just not in the

best interest of the baby to continue

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pushing and putting them in so much

pain in the hopes of survival, so that's

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kind of a double edged sword, actually.

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Joshua: It is, and I feel like we could

possibly overdiagnose, and some of

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those diagnoses never come to happen.

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I mean, I do feel though that the

medical profession technology wise, has

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come a long way, but I think that we've

probably lost some of the human touch

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a little bit too with some doctors.

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I know some people have had some bad

experiences, but I'm not here to talk

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about that; here to talk about you.

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With that said, I want to move on to

the fact that you started a coaching

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business, so I got to put two and two

together here for a second, so you've

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done not only being a gymnast, not only

you were premature, not only were you a

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nurse, but then all of a sudden, it seems

like a left hand turn happened and you

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wanted to be a coach, so walk us through

what was in your thought process from

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leaving nursing, which you've done for

over 20 years to be able to do coaching.

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Sara: Yeah, absolutely, so the one

really cool thing about me is I am a

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registered nurse, and my coaching is

a certification within nursing, so

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it is board certified nurse coach,

so I had to take an examination.

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I'm certified by a national board,

and I will have to maintain those

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certifications as part of my nursing

license, so it's cool that we get

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to combine both of those things, and

because of my experience as a nurse,

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I can hold a different kind of space.

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For people that have medical issues,

maybe bring in more of the holistic

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approach because of my expansive

knowledge, that some other coaches just

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might not have, because they haven't had

that experience in training quite yet.

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Joshua: I love that, and I have always

said on the show, I know I'm a coach,

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but I've had other coaches on the show

and people ask me, "Are you crazy?

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You're bringing your competition

on the show.", and I've said, "No.

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They're not.

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They do something completely different and

they come out at all different angles.",

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so I embrace them, and this is yet another

fine example of it, Sara, because I never

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had somebody on the show thus far that

has been through nursing, but was board

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certified to be able to provide nursing

coaching, essentially, to clients, so

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how would you distinguish yourself from,

say, the traditional coach, and I know

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you've mentioned a few things, but can

you more specifically walk us through,

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maybe example or two, of how that would

differ, especially with somebody that

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has a medical issue, and by all means,

I'm not asking you to talk about any

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existing clients, because I know you have

confidentiality and HIPAA requirements

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too, but I wonder if you could just share

at a high level how that would work.

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Sara: Yeah, absolutely so

maybe there's someone who

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wants to lose 10 pounds, right?

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I think we all want to lose 10 pounds.

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Joshua: I need to lose 20

pounds, so that's great.

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Yeah.

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Sara: Yes, so my client

wants to lose 20 pounds.

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I'm not a traditional coach, so I don't

know for sure how they would approach

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it, but if I were approaching it to

see why they want to lose 20 pounds,

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first, we're going to do a holistic life

assessment, and we're going to talk about

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not only what you eat, and how much do

you exercise, but, how's your sleep?

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How's your stress management?

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How's your support at home?

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What's your spiritual life like?

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How are your finances impacting things,

and then, once we get kind of that

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baseline holistic assessment, then

we get to go into, "Okay, but why do

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you want to lose 10 pounds?", because

more often than not, it's not just

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that they want to lose 10 pounds.

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It's, "They want to feel more

comfortable in their body."

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"They want to feel more confident."

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"They want to perform at a different

level than they're performing now."

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"They want more energy to spend with

their kids so that they can create more

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time and memories.", so really, they want

to lose 10 pounds so that they can be

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more fully present in their kids lives,

so it's that type of diving deeper, you

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know, peeling back the onion layers, to

figure out what's really at the heart

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of this quest to lose 10 pounds and get

healthier, and then we can explore all the

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ways, and all the layers of support, that

can help us lose 10 pounds, and shed some

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of those unwanted mindsets and thoughts

and limiting beliefs that are probably

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have been hanging around for a while.

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Joshua: I failed to mention

earlier the name of your coaching

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business, which I should do now.

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It's Cedar Wellness Coaching, and we'll

talk more about how you can get in touch

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with Sara, but as we get towards the

end of the show, but Sara, with starting

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Cedar Wellness, have you been changed by

not only the clients that you've worked

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with, but maybe you have learned a thing

or two from even the people you've worked

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with, and I love asking this question.

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I'll give you a moment to think about it,

because I'm sure there's numerous examples

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you have, but I know personally myself,

I've been open now for more than a year

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and a half and have learned so much about

not only myself, doing this podcast, first

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off, but even from my own clients that

it's allowed me to evolve and be a better

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coach to not only find ways and strategies

to navigate through challenging times,

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but also, get them to where they need to

be, because I want them to ultimately,

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in my version of my business, that be

the best version of who they are, so

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do you have anything that comes to mind

that has helped you at this point to

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get to where you're at for you clients?

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Sara: Absolutely.

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I think it's always an honor to support

clients, and I don't know about you,

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but I always find that when I'm working

with the client, so often, they will

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bring up an issue or a challenge that I

also am facing in my own life, and it's

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such a reflection that I need to keep

continuing to do the work myself: the

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inner work, the mindset work, all of

those kinds of things, prioritizing, my

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balance, and that kind of thing, so that

I can take my clients deeper, because

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I can't take my clients any deeper than

I have already gone myself, so yeah,

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whether it's perfectionism coming up,

high achiever, I work with a lot of women

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that are in a leadership role, as well

as balancing motherhood, and I was in

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that role myself in the NICU, and it is a

challenging role to be in, and we haven't

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talked about this yet, but being in a

role like that, I was a bit unbalanced

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in that role, and I think that was maybe

part of what led to a big health journey

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that we haven't touched on yet, that

really was why I started my coaching

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business, why I left the NICU and started

my coaching business, because I need a

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better life balance, and 14 hour shifts

in the hospital is not my definition

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of a very good work life balance.

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Joshua: I overworked myself quite a

lot in a variety of management jobs.

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I'm a government professional, and still

do that even as I continue to build my

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own coaching business, but even with

that said, it has definitely taken a

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toll on me in my early twenties because

I didn't learn what that balance was

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until much later on in life, and so, with

you saying that, and about your health

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journey, which I didn't realize that was

a big part of this, what have you learned

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about transitioning into the coaching

world that has helped you in your health?

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Sara: I have learned that I need far

more margin than I ever realized.

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I need more margin in my schedule.

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I need more margin to take care of

myself, and my family, and to be able

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to be fully present with my family.

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I have two girls that are middle school

and high school, and people always say,

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"Your kids need you when they're young.",

and they do, that's true, but your kids

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need you equally as much, or maybe more,

as they're going through these teenage

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years, and all the things that are coming

at them, so I need enough margin in my

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life to be able to be present and be

there for them when they're ready to

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talk, because if I'm not there then,

then I'm going to miss the moment, so

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that's what I mean when I say I need more

margin, to take care of my own body, and

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my kids, and yeah, just be more present.

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Joshua: I love the way you said that.

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Margin.

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I don't think of it that way.

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I mean, I usually use the words "time",

and "scheduling", and things like

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:

that, and they're so 20th century.

321

:

Putting on a calendar, balancing that,

but margin, that's a whole unique

322

:

aspect because it's such more broad

and encompassing of what I think people

323

:

need to work on, so I am really, okay.

324

:

I really am curious.

325

:

Now, I have to ask this, so, how do you

find margin then on your day to day?

326

:

I did have a question about you working

with healthcare professionals; those

327

:

that are in a leadership role, so

glad you brought that up, but I wonder

328

:

if you could start with yourself,

and then we'll expand into that.

329

:

How do you create that margin?

330

:

Sara: Yeah, for sure.

331

:

I think part of it is

being really intentional.

332

:

As we know, and I am fully guilty

of this as well, but it's really

333

:

easy to spend an unintentional 40

minutes scrolling on your phone, so

334

:

being super mindful about, "Okay.

335

:

I've checked my social media for 10

minutes, and now I need to be done,

336

:

because I need to go move my body in the

morning, or I need to go walk the dog.",

337

:

and I want to enjoy being outside walking

the dog, and like, actually, looking at

338

:

the sky, and noticing the grass that's

getting greener in the spring, and like

339

:

those kind of things to really bring

more presence into my day, super simple

340

:

things, instead of talking to my friend,

half paying attention to her on the phone,

341

:

while half paying attention to my dog,

who's trying to run away, or chase the

342

:

squirrel, like little, tangible things

like that, I like to help myself, and

343

:

support other people in, where can you

make the little tangible shifts that

344

:

might feel like no big deal, but when you

actually change your life with them, it

345

:

makes all the difference in the world?

346

:

If you could imagine having an extra

hour of your day of "you" time,

347

:

think of the possibilities, and

how much more balanced, and more

348

:

margin, in your life you would have.

349

:

Joshua: I've had other people in the

show, Sara, that I've talked about it in

350

:

terms of energy, how we use our energy,

not only in the transference of not only

351

:

the actions that we perform on a daily

basis, but also the energy of the people

352

:

that we surround ourselves with, and you

are essentially saying it in a way that

353

:

we actually makes a lot more practical

sense, than people being like, "Oh, yes.

354

:

It's another energy conversation.

355

:

Let's do some Reiki.

356

:

Let's do some power yoga, all these

different health things.", which obviously

357

:

those are all important, and I'm sure as

a nurse, you would absolutely recommend

358

:

those sort of things into a daily routine,

but you said it was such intentionality

359

:

that I feel that you've had people

that you've worked with to kind of find

360

:

the margin, if you will, so, building

off of what you just said, how do you

361

:

help healthcare professionals, or even

help clients in general, that would be

362

:

asking you to help find that margin?

363

:

Is there certain things that you do

that help them to walk through that,

364

:

and maybe you could just give a general

example of something that our listeners

365

:

can do even today, for that matter,

that would help them find that margin.

366

:

Sara: Yeah, for sure, so the first step,

I think, being a nurse is assessment.

367

:

We need to assess the situation, and do

the whole body, whole life, assessment.

368

:

How is your body feeling?

369

:

What demands do you have at work?

370

:

What demands do you have at home?

371

:

What support system, what resources do

you have; all of that kind of stuff,

372

:

so I kind of have a framework of the

foundation that we're working with,

373

:

and then, once we get through there, I

like to ask them like, "What is margin

374

:

and balance for you?", because it's

going to be different for every person.

375

:

I have worked with a client in the past

who she is a female business owner and

376

:

she has two small kids, and her husband

is a business owner as well, and he has

377

:

on call hours, and his schedule can be

a little bit crazy, so for her, even

378

:

at 15 minutes of time that's not being

pulled in every direction feels like such

379

:

a gift, so how can we look at your life

and your schedule, and how can we find

380

:

15 minutes for you to start with, and

I know that people are like, "Really?

381

:

It's 15 minutes.", but literally, that

is a hard task sometimes for people,

382

:

and that's where we have to start

is we're going to start small and

383

:

tangible, because if we ask right away

for two hours off the top, it's not

384

:

realistic, so I'm here for realistic,

implementable- I think I made that word

385

:

up, changes to start and to take baby

steps, because you know how it goes when

386

:

you take too big of a step at the gym.

387

:

If you're like, "Okay, great.

388

:

I'm going to get fit.

389

:

I'm going to start by

running 12 miles today."

390

:

That's not going to work out.

391

:

You got to start running half a mile, and

then a mile, and build on those things,

392

:

so with this particular client, one of the

things we did was she had not been very

393

:

good in the past about being specific and

asking for help at home, and she got a

394

:

little more courage, and a little bit more

direct with her partner and said, "Hey.

395

:

Could you help do this, this, and

this?", and he was very willing to help.

396

:

He just didn't know that she wanted him

to do that, so just being direct, and

397

:

asking for those simple things, really

gave her an extra 15 minutes while

398

:

dinner was being made so that she could

play with her kids, and that means all

399

:

the difference when you can be more

intentional and more present with your

400

:

children, even if it's for 15 minutes.

401

:

Joshua: Even just having that extra

15 minutes to do something with

402

:

intentionality, to be able to do with

purpose, I think speaks volumes to

403

:

why sometimes we don't give ourselves

that credence to work on ourselves,

404

:

meaning be able to read a book, to

be able to run that half mile, to

405

:

be able to spend time with our kids.

406

:

I think those are all important things

because, like you said, there's a

407

:

holistic component to being able to

provide that self worth, and if we're

408

:

not able to do that, if we're not able

to shed some time to be able to do those

409

:

experiences, well that creates a lot of

difficulty in the long run, being able

410

:

to feel like we have anything to give,

if we don't have that energy, or that

411

:

margin, to give in the first place.

412

:

Sara: Exactly, exactly, exactly.

413

:

Joshua: Do you think there's a crisis

in being well balanced, especially in

414

:

the United States, because I feel like

there is with not only the fact that

415

:

now we have to work two or more jobs.

416

:

We don't get the opportunity to take care

of things because the costs are so high,

417

:

so we're putting off medical appointments.

418

:

We might even be putting off buying

nutritious food, things of that nature.

419

:

Do you think that's contributing to

a lot of the different issues that

420

:

maybe you see in clients too, or

do you think it's something else?

421

:

Sara: 1000%.

422

:

Yes.

423

:

I think it contributes to the

state of our mental health.

424

:

It's a huge factor in the rise in

chronic illness in our country,

425

:

and other preventable illnesses,

because we don't have the margin

426

:

and the balance in our world.

427

:

We don't have the margin to, like you

said, prepare and buy nutritious food.

428

:

Maybe we can buy it, but we don't give

ourselves the time to prepare it, so

429

:

then it goes rotten in the fridge,

because we didn't actually cut it up.

430

:

We don't have the time that we

need and deserve to spend with our

431

:

families, whether that's children,

nieces, and nephews; aging parents.

432

:

We don't even have the time that we

should have to spend time with our

433

:

pets who give us so much love and joy

in our lives, because we're too busy

434

:

running the rat race of life, and trying

to keep up with everyone's standards,

435

:

and raising prices, and all of those

things, which really hinder us in

436

:

living a slower, more intentional, life.

437

:

Joshua: Yeah, and I'm guilty as

charged when it comes to throwing

438

:

out food that should have been

made and cut up many times.

439

:

I can't tell you how many hundreds,

even thousands of dollars that I've

440

:

thrown away, just because of the lack

of time that I give myself to do it

441

:

because of the busyness of our lives,

let alone, all the things that happen

442

:

through the day to day that sometimes

I'm beating myself up for it, and I

443

:

still do that even to this day, Sara.

444

:

I know I shared a little bit about my

story before we started, but I think

445

:

that we often are programmed to think

that we have to do things a certain

446

:

way because society tells us to, but as

many of my guests even on the show have

447

:

said, it's about being able to separate

yourself from that, and be able to help

448

:

you not only create that context in

your life so that you can give yourself

449

:

that time, but to also press forward,

so we're getting close to the end of our

450

:

time, and I have been thinking about the

fact that you have been through a lot

451

:

of these unique experiences that people

sometimes don't even know what it's like

452

:

to experience that: being prematurely

born, being in an accident in a sports

453

:

competition and being a gymnast, being a

NICU nurse, and then also, helping others

454

:

find, essentially, the holistic balance.

455

:

Do you feel that there's more to give in

what you're developing, and when I ask

456

:

you that question, I'm really referring

to the fact that do you feel like you're

457

:

doing what you have set out to do finally

in your life to feel that purpose, to feel

458

:

that grit, that opportunity that you have?

459

:

In other words, are you living with

grace, because I noticed that that is a

460

:

big part of why you build this foundation

to help others in your coaching, because

461

:

you want to live those same principles,

but do you think there's still work

462

:

yet to do, especially for yourself?

463

:

Sara: I think there's always work to do.

464

:

Always.

465

:

I think that I would not be

honest if I didn't say that

466

:

there wasn't work to be done.

467

:

I think you can always balance yourself

more, and be more intentional with your

468

:

time and your energy, and what you're

consuming in any way, whether that's what

469

:

you're listening to, what you're watching

on TV, what you're scrolling, what you're

470

:

putting into your body, the places that

you are letting your body be, whether

471

:

it's in nature or in the city, like so

many ways that we can consume, and I think

472

:

that, absolutely, there's always room.

473

:

I'm on the path for sure, and I'm

so much more balanced than I was.

474

:

My health journey really inspired me to

create this business so that I can help

475

:

other women not be in the same spot,

and men too, but help them not become

476

:

in the same spot where your body forces

you to stop what you're doing in order

477

:

to pay attention and listen to it, so

creating a more balanced life with more

478

:

margin in it so that you can continue to

serve the people that you really love.

479

:

Joshua: Being able to serve those people

is not only a blessing, because I think

480

:

for being a coach, being able to help

those people is such a rewarding feeling.

481

:

That's like what I enjoy doing is to

help those people see maybe something

482

:

that they didn't see before, but for what

you've said too, I think it's so important

483

:

to always think with the framework of,

"There's always something more to learn,

484

:

so why not enjoy what this life gives us?"

485

:

Sara, thanks so much for sharing all this.

486

:

I want to give you the last few

minutes to pitch your business,

487

:

Cedar Wellness Coaching.

488

:

I also know we didn't talk about your

book, which is called When Grit & Grace

489

:

Collide: Persevering Through Life’s

Challenges with Grit & God’s Grace.

490

:

I was wondering, maybe you can also

throw in a couple of tidbits about

491

:

the book and how people can access it,

maybe they're interested in purchasing

492

:

it, but let us know how we can get in

contact with you, and I'll give you

493

:

the last few minutes to do all of that.

494

:

Sara: Yeah, absolutely.

495

:

Yes, so my business is Cedar Wellness

and Coaching, and, primarily, it

496

:

focuses on supporting women that are in

a leadership role as they balance the

497

:

role of leadership and motherhood, and

releasing the guilt that comes along

498

:

with those roles: slowing down to have

more intentional living, being present

499

:

with your kids so that you are actually

listening to what they're telling you,

500

:

and you're watching movie night with them,

instead of checking emails on your phone

501

:

while you're supposed to be watching the

Disney movie, so really, just helping

502

:

them support in that way, and also I like

to support organizations in a leadership

503

:

coaching capacity as well, and yeah, just

helping them create that life with more

504

:

margin so that they can be an even better

leader and the best version of themselves

505

:

with that lens, and you can find me

on Instagram: cedar.wellness.coaching;

506

:

Facebook is the same.

507

:

I think my link for connecting

with my landing page will be in

508

:

the notes, and as far as my book;

yeah, he did a great job saying the

509

:

title, and it's available on Amazon.

510

:

I self published it, so there might

be misplaced commas, not the perfect

511

:

grammatical sentence structure, but I

really wanted it to be a transparent

512

:

conversation about my life and my journey

and feeling like we're having coffee

513

:

together, not a textbook style read.

514

:

Joshua: Awesome, and I encourage

those that are interested in

515

:

more Sara story since you got

to hear portions of that today.

516

:

I encourage you to check that out too.

517

:

I'll also have a link in the episode

notes if you want to go and purchase

518

:

the published book that is available.

519

:

You know, Sara, I always find it

interesting to have women on the show that

520

:

have your interesting type of background,

because for me, I always wanted to have

521

:

not only people in my life that I would

surround myself that would help push

522

:

me and make me feel like I'm encouraged

to do whatever is possible, but you

523

:

have that nurturing spirit, I can tell.

524

:

We were even talking about your daughter

before we got on today's episode, and

525

:

I know that you are definitely leading

that life of intentionality, being

526

:

able to feel grace and fill that void

for so many people, and I can just

527

:

see that radiate from you, and I think

those sort of people are needed in this

528

:

world that we have those caregivers,

and I will always stick up for nurses

529

:

because of my mom, and my sisters

being able to go through that program.

530

:

I have a true appreciation for what you do

because if it wasn't for nurses, doctors

531

:

would not be able to do their job, and

nobody would be able to take care of each

532

:

other if we didn't have somebody by our

bedside to do just that, so thank you for

533

:

the over 20 years and continuing service

that you do in the nursing field and doing

534

:

it in- I want to say a weird way, but it's

actually a very unique way of coaching,

535

:

which for all those reasons, thanks for

being on Speaking From The Heart today.

536

:

Thanks for sharing a little bit

about your story, and continue

537

:

being an awesome coach that you are.

538

:

I always appreciate having others

on the show, and only root for you

539

:

to continue having great success.

540

:

Sara: Thank you so much.

541

:

Thank you for your very kind words,

and I appreciate the opportunity and

542

:

I think I will forever be serving and

nurturing others as long as I am here on

543

:

this earth, so I appreciate those words.

544

:

Joshua: I think that is such an important

role, especially in society to have

545

:

those people that nurture us, so thanks

for continuing to do that, and again,

546

:

thanks for being a part of the show.

547

:

Sara: Thank you so much.

548

:

Joshua: Once again, I want to thank Sara

for being part of the show, and helping

549

:

me, and my listeners like you, build

a better opportunity for the future,

550

:

because regardless of what we might be

suffering as ailments, maybe a little

551

:

bit of a headache, maybe a little bit of

neck pain, maybe even breaking both your

552

:

neck and head, especially with what Sara

even shared about the accident that she

553

:

had, it makes us realize that we have

to work on ourselves, both physically

554

:

and mentally to get to where we need to

be, but yet at the same time, when you

555

:

go through life, do you ever think that

you're going to have a lot of struggles?

556

:

Probably not.

557

:

We don't have that capacity to understand

that, especially at a young age.

558

:

Sara had to go through a lot of different

things though, especially being born

559

:

premature, to overcome some of the

adversities and even the struggles, that

560

:

were placed on her, but as I even said in

the beginning, it's about those stitches.

561

:

Those are the things that are the

battle marks that have shown that we've

562

:

endured and have so much to offer in

creating opportunities to share our

563

:

stories, to share our perspectives,

which even Sara did with her book.

564

:

I love the fact that she has this grit,

but yet at the same time, has the grace

565

:

to give so many opportunities through her

clients, through the people that she's

566

:

interacting with, to create opportunities

even in the scariest of times.

567

:

Being even a nurse coach, something I

never even heard of that even existed,

568

:

just shows the fascination of this world

that we have all kinds of coaches and

569

:

proves my point that regardless of who

you find, there is always going to be

570

:

somebody out there that is willing to walk

alongside of you, no matter what might

571

:

happen, but even with all those holistic

experiences, being able to have impacts

572

:

and directions of where you want to go in

life, you have to understand that even if

573

:

you want to take that holistic approach,

even if you wanted to have a wholesome

574

:

experience and live life as it's meant to

be lived, not knowing what to expect and

575

:

reacting to the changes, you can obviously

see that there is always going to be an

576

:

opportunity to build a bigger, better

version of yourself, regardless of where

577

:

you are going, but the challenges, the

things that we are going through in our

578

:

life, do require us to have inner work.

579

:

We are never going to be that

perfectionist that we always wanted to be.

580

:

I know that it's not possible

because I almost ended my life

581

:

thinking that I had to work so

hard, trying to achieve something

582

:

that was not possible to achieve.

583

:

Even friends, even a past guest, one of

my high school friends, Amanda Bacon,

584

:

who we've had on the show, even pointed

this out to me at a very young age

585

:

and I refused to even listen to her.

586

:

Many years later, I'm

finally listening to her.

587

:

I'm finally seeing that this bigger

picture of trying to think that

588

:

you can overcome anything with

sheer wit, determination, and grit.

589

:

That is not how life works, but

yet, we have to find the margin.

590

:

The margin in which is the

intersection of taking care of

591

:

yourself and taking care of others.

592

:

I know what you're doing.

593

:

You're not only listening to this podcast,

but you're doing probably multiple other

594

:

things: running, weightlifting, taking

care of your children, driving to and from

595

:

the grocery store, maybe a restaurant with

your hubby, or even your wifey, maybe it's

596

:

somebody else that you have been spending

time with that you shouldn't be spending

597

:

time with, if you know what I mean, but

yet, at the same time, you are distracted.

598

:

You are not living in that margin,

because you're taking care of other

599

:

things that you shouldn't be taking care

of right now, because this is your time.

600

:

Your time to be a little bit

more intentional, and to make

601

:

something even more impactful

happen in your life, but I get it.

602

:

In this ever changing world of busyness,

when am I ever going to find time to

603

:

just focus on one thing, at one time,

but yet at other cultures, that seems

604

:

to be always the opportunity to be

able to work on those kind of aspects.

605

:

Look at even Spain for that matter.

606

:

They have times in the afternoon in which

they take a siesta, a break, a rest, and

607

:

then they go back and work in the evening.

608

:

Yes!

609

:

Here in the United States, we

certainly don't do that, and I

610

:

know for a fact why we don't do it.

611

:

It makes zero sense to be able to do that,

because we'd rather just work one straight

612

:

continuous pattern, and then have the

rest of the time for ourselves, but that

613

:

isn't how life works in other countries.

614

:

Being more intentional, instead of

scrolling on your phone for that matter.

615

:

Endless clickbait of Facebook ads,

Instagram posts, even Twitter feeds

616

:

for that matter, can certainly distract

us from the bigger life that we have.

617

:

Netflix and chill.

618

:

Being able to watch Hulu.

619

:

Play games on your PlayStation, Xbox, or

whatever video game system that you have.

620

:

All of those are ultimately distractions

from the overall purpose that you might be

621

:

living in your life; living in the margin,

because that margin, as much as we want to

622

:

call it work and life balance, sometimes

doesn't always work, and I get it.

623

:

I understand why.

624

:

There's no such thing as pure work

and life balance, which even another

625

:

coach, even outside of today's

episode, even joked about with me.

626

:

"There's no such thing as balance."

627

:

You have to be understanding that the

little things that you have that shift

628

:

you into doing even more little things

comes with consistency and practice.

629

:

It comes with our work and life balance.

630

:

With all the demands, and all the

supports, and all the assessments,

631

:

all the tools that are available to

us that create that balance in order

632

:

to work on balance, to see the overall

development of balance, means that

633

:

we have to have an introspective and

extrospective look at who we are.

634

:

Don't you understand?

635

:

I know that that sounds all confusing

using those big words that I've been using

636

:

for the last few moments, but yet, that's

what's really pushing us into a corner.

637

:

All these things that are part of our

life, all the things that we have to

638

:

contribute towards our physical and

mental health, all the things that

639

:

we have going on in our life, is all

because we're not living in balance,

640

:

and friends, if you're not living in

balance, you are not living at all.

641

:

You're striving towards something that

will never be achievable, even if you

642

:

think it is, because you're always

going to be spinning, and spinning, and

643

:

spinning, never thinking that you're

ever going to get there, because all

644

:

you've been doing is working, working,

working, with no toil, no result, from it.

645

:

I've been fortunate enough to

have a variety of clients now

646

:

that have seen that other side.

647

:

Even after over 19 months of being

open, I'm starting to see the people

648

:

that are really taking this seriously.

649

:

They've seen success from their own eyes.

650

:

Even my friends over at Next Generation

Personal Training are starting to see the

651

:

fruits of their labors by opening a cycle

studio that I'm super excited about, and

652

:

being able to have the opportunity of a

lifetime to work on things that even the

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:

owner, Brock Waluk, that we've had on

the show achieved the things that he's

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:

been looking to do for such a long time.

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:

That didn't happen overnight.

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He was spending a lot more work.

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There was a lot more balance that was

happening even later on, but it didn't

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:

happen overnight with that transition.

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:

It started with just a

small, incremental step.

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:

Even Brock would tell you, that some

of the biggest challenges that he had

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:

in his life, even as what he shared

on the show on episode number 99, was

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:

about understanding what he did wrong,

and what he needed to do to fix it,

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:

but Sara's story, the guest that we've

had on today's show, really shares with

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us, and exemplifies the fact that you

can do this, and that there are people

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that are willing to help you find that

balance, even if that means that we

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:

have to live in the life of margin.

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I know that it's so tough to find that

life, to find that purpose, but that's

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:

where it starts from, which I have said.

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It's about the purpose in which we

stitch together, the battle scars

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:

that we have in our life, come from

all those past versions of ourselves,

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:

sometimes letting ourselves down,

and sometimes seeing success where

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:

we've never seen success before.

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:

Even if we're able to coach

people in a variety of different

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:

industries, even nurses for that

matter, we have to learn to endure.

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:

We have to learn to find the opportunity.

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:

We have to learn that even in the scariest

of times, there will be strangers, demons,

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things in the other world, that will

make us feel like we're petrified to

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:

be able to work on ourselves, but if we

challenge ourselves to do the inner work,

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I promise you that margin will turn into

big dividends that will pay off, financial

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:

or otherwise, because if you live in that

life where you learn, grow, and inspire,

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I know that you will be able to build the

things that will allow you to have all

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:

the supports, all the things that will

help others see their overall development,

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:

and all that you need to worry about,

is finding that happy medium, and that

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:

medium is closer than you might think.

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:

Take that time today.

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Write that journal.

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Write that next chapter in your book.

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:

Record a podcast.

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:

Work on your vision board.

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:

Work on the things in which you

want to achieve as your goals.

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:

Start writing down what those goals

look like, especially as we get

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:

closer to the end of this year.

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:

2025 is soon going to be upon us, but yet

at the same time, find a part time job,

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:

not in the financial sense, and not in the

sense in which it knocks that time away

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:

from you, that allows you to spend time

away from your phone, instead of endlessly

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:

scrolling through all the various options

that are on your Apple TV or Android

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:

device, and find ways in which Amazon,

and even Temu for that matter, don't have

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:

an influence over your buying patterns.

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:

Find the margin in what

you are able to create.

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:

Find the margin in which you're

able to contribute, because when you

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:

contribute and create, there will be

a lot more to take care of than just

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:

the endless scrolling on your phone,

or even the two kids that you might

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:

have, or even the husband and wife.

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:

You will find something else that you

will be passionate about; and hey!

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:

Maybe you'll be a small

business owner yourself.

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:

Maybe running a small little

store outside of your home.

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:

Maybe even running the things that you

always wanted to passionately do, and it

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:

was all because you changed your mindset

to live that all conscious, balanced

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:

life, without sacrificing who you are.

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Thanks for listening to episode

number 144 of Speaking From the

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Heart, and I look forward to

hearing from your heart very soon.

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Outro: Thanks for listening.

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:

For more information about our podcast

and future shows, search for Speaking From

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The Heart to subscribe and be notified

wherever you listen to your podcasts.

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:

Visit us at www.yourspeakingvoice.biz

for more information about potential

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:

services that can help you create

the best version of yourself.

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See you next time.

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About the Podcast

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Speaking From The Heart
Your Speaking Voice LLC's Business Podcast

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About your host

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Joshua Smith

Joshua D. Smith is the Owner and Founder of Your Speaking Voice, a life coaching, business coaching, and public speaking company based in Carlisle, PA. Serving clients across the world, Joshua got his start in personal/professional development and public speaking in April of 2012 through his extensive involvement in an educational non-profit organization called Toastmasters International.

Toastmasters International operates clubs both domestically and internationally that focus on teaching leadership, development, and public speaking skills. Joshua quickly excelled in Toastmasters International and found that he had a passion for leadership and helping others find their confidence and their true "speaking voice". Joshua has held all club officer roles and most District level positions in Toastmasters International and belongs to numerous clubs throughout the organization. Joshua has also been recognized as two-time Distinguished Toastmaster, the highest award the organization bestows for achievement in leadership and communication.

Outside of his community involvement, education is something that Joshua has always taken great pride in. His academic achievements include a number of degrees from Alvernia and Shippensburg University. He earned a Bachelor's degree in political science and communications from Alvernia in 2009, a masters of business administration from Alvernia in 2010, and later a masters in public administration from Shippensburg in 2014.

In the professional world, Joshua has held multiple positions with the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania for over 14 years which includes a variety of data analytics, procurement, budgeting, business process improvement (IT and non-IT), legal compliance, and working with the blind. He has applied his public speaking and development skills in the professional world to tackle numerous public speaking engagements and presentations from all levels of the organization, including executive management.

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