Episode #5 - Building Confidence Through Physical & Mental Challenges

Intro: 00:00:00

Welcome to the podcast where relationships, confidence, and

Intro: 00:00:03

determination, all converge into an amazing, heartfelt experience.

Intro: 00:00:08

This is Speaking From The Heart.

Joshua: 00:00:11

Welcome back to episode number five of Speaking From the Heart.

Joshua: 00:00:15

Today we're going to talk about confidence, the ability to overcome

Joshua: 00:00:20

the lack of confidence or even the overly confident not only just in the

Joshua: 00:00:27

physical, but also the mental, and this covers the second value in which

Joshua: 00:00:31

I started my business on in order to help individuals realize their true

Joshua: 00:00:35

potential by unlocking their hidden voice.

Joshua: 00:00:39

Confidence can be a little bit of a cliffhanger, and

Joshua: 00:00:44

you really have two options.

Joshua: 00:00:46

You can be overly confident, which other people will say you are too cocky.

Joshua: 00:00:53

Then there is also the other side of it in which you might be viewed as

Joshua: 00:00:57

underconfident or having a lack of confidence, and it can be very troubling

Joshua: 00:01:03

to hear that sort of statement, especially if you are trying to

Joshua: 00:01:06

become a person that wants to be able to overcome the physical and mental

Joshua: 00:01:11

challenges that might lie before you.

Joshua: 00:01:15

I have to say that in this type of situation that I'm in, that I always

Joshua: 00:01:20

am trying to build the best version of myself as I work with others, I often

Joshua: 00:01:25

hear confidence is holding us back, from a multitude of different types

Joshua: 00:01:30

of things that we want to accomplish, whether those are the things that we

Joshua: 00:01:34

are setting ourselves out to become, or what we are trying to be down the road.

Joshua: 00:01:41

I'm talking the long term, whether that's one year, five years, 10 years down the

Joshua: 00:01:46

road, and a lot of people get hung up and even in just the first few months because

Joshua: 00:01:51

they're uncertain about the ability to project that level of confidence

Joshua: 00:01:56

that is needed within themselves.

Joshua: 00:01:58

If we're all going to have a conversation about confidence, we

Joshua: 00:02:02

have to talk about what are some of the underlying factors that might be

Joshua: 00:02:06

bothering someone as part of this.

Joshua: 00:02:10

Every time that I hear the word confidence, I think about the

Joshua: 00:02:14

possibilities of what that might mean, so it always has a future tense to it.

Joshua: 00:02:21

For many of you, you might have a different definition of what that

Joshua: 00:02:24

confidence is and might be something that's happening right at that

Joshua: 00:02:26

moment, but you're still thinking about it no matter what it is, which

Joshua: 00:02:31

is activating the brain and how it processes that type of information.

Joshua: 00:02:37

Whether it is about the confidence that you're trying to show or what you

Joshua: 00:02:41

are trying to share with someone else, and that's always a difficult thing,

Joshua: 00:02:45

especially with the types of individuals that you might be working with.

Joshua: 00:02:50

It might even be some of the type of challenges or responses that you're going

Joshua: 00:02:53

to receive, whether that is somebody from your family or it's your boss that's

Joshua: 00:02:58

asking for different types of demands.

Joshua: 00:03:01

The most important thing to do, however, to ensure that those sort

Joshua: 00:03:05

of things are covered in the most atypical way is to break it down.

Joshua: 00:03:12

What are the things that are actually causing you to feel

Joshua: 00:03:16

that way in the first place?

Joshua: 00:03:18

For me, confidence has always been a struggle.

Joshua: 00:03:22

As a child, I knew that many people did not appreciate what I looked like.

Joshua: 00:03:27

I was a chubby kid, having to go through the vast difficulties of

Joshua: 00:03:32

being picked on, teased, ridiculed for the lunch options that I chose,

Joshua: 00:03:37

I decided to do the one thing that would forever change my life, not eat.

Joshua: 00:03:44

Now, I don't know if I would be claiming myself to be an anorexic, which I'm not

Joshua: 00:03:49

saying that at all, and I definitely appreciate those listening to this show

Joshua: 00:03:53

that are going through such a struggle, but I realize that if I could remove

Joshua: 00:03:59

the factor that was causing all that teasing in the first place, I would be

Joshua: 00:04:04

able to feel a lot better about myself.

Joshua: 00:04:07

I, in other words, I wouldn't have that become a factor for consideration for some

Joshua: 00:04:13

of the bullies, some of the intimidators, even my own personal viewpoint about

Joshua: 00:04:18

myself, which at that point in my life, I felt very despondent, very alone.

Joshua: 00:04:25

A lot of people do have to go through those sort of challenges, and I

Joshua: 00:04:29

definitely encourage those that have been lifelong sufferers to seek out

Joshua: 00:04:33

the professional help that's needed.

Joshua: 00:04:35

In my business with dealing with these sort of situations, that might be

Joshua: 00:04:39

the precursor to having confidence.

Joshua: 00:04:42

It's all about breaking down what are the elements that cause

Joshua: 00:04:45

that issue in the first place?

Joshua: 00:04:47

It's not easy, and each person's story is unique in their own way.

Joshua: 00:04:53

Many of the people that I have worked with have different types of different

Joshua: 00:04:57

aspects that cause them to rationalize in different ways, and that's really

Joshua: 00:05:03

important to consider that each time that we think about this sort of

Joshua: 00:05:07

thought process, whether it is something that we're lacking confidence of or

Joshua: 00:05:12

overconfidence in, we always have to understand why it is what it is.

Joshua: 00:05:18

Why is it creating some of those issues that we are having in the first place?

Joshua: 00:05:24

If we can get to the heart of it, everything will change for the better.

Joshua: 00:05:31

Confidence is not something that you easily find in anybody, and sometimes

Joshua: 00:05:36

that means establishing a level of trust in which you're able to communicate and

Joshua: 00:05:40

share different types of information.

Joshua: 00:05:43

As a podcast host, I have to say that it is very difficult for me to

Joshua: 00:05:47

even articulate the very important matters that I wanna share with you

Joshua: 00:05:51

because that means putting trust in an audience that I have never seen before.

Joshua: 00:05:57

Often that is concluded to be what's called imposter syndrome; having that

Joshua: 00:06:02

ridicule factor in the back of your brain telling you every time, "you're

Joshua: 00:06:06

not good enough", "you're not gonna be able to do this", "you're never

Joshua: 00:06:08

going to succeed", "your voice sounds terrible", "you don't have great ideas".

Joshua: 00:06:12

These thoughts are ridiculous.

Joshua: 00:06:16

Those are the things that are in our lives that are always judging.

Joshua: 00:06:23

There doesn't have to be anybody physically in front of us to have that

Joshua: 00:06:26

sort of manifestation happening all the time, and that's why confidence

Joshua: 00:06:31

is often the most difficult of topics to discuss with someone because

Joshua: 00:06:36

that voice changes all the time.

Joshua: 00:06:39

All kinds of different situations have different inputs.

Joshua: 00:06:42

They all have different outputs in which they create different factors.

Joshua: 00:06:46

As somebody that has struggled with being able to project that

Joshua: 00:06:49

level of confidence, I'm always taking the guessing game out of it.

Joshua: 00:06:54

I'm trying to take it, analyze it, and put it back into reality as to

Joshua: 00:06:58

if that is really what's happening, and that is what is so difficult

Joshua: 00:07:04

for many people to address, and I can understand and rationalize with

Joshua: 00:07:09

you completely, and it takes time.

Joshua: 00:07:12

It's not something that happens overnight where you think magically as you get

Joshua: 00:07:16

up one morning, I'm going to be extra confident today walking outta the house,

Joshua: 00:07:21

greeting my significant other and the kids, and being able to walk out the door,

Joshua: 00:07:25

go about your day, interacting with the dozens, maybe even hundreds of people

Joshua: 00:07:30

that you interact with on your travels, whether that's by car, by subway, whether

Joshua: 00:07:35

that is by airplane for those lucky few.

Joshua: 00:07:39

I know that for many of us, even in the times that we have now passed the COVID

Joshua: 00:07:44

19 pandemic, many of us were suffering at home with that lack of confidence

Joshua: 00:07:48

not being able to extend our voice to somebody else, to be able to share what

Joshua: 00:07:54

was really important on our minds, because that level of communication wasn't as

Joshua: 00:07:59

much connectivity as it was with having a already established relationship where

Joshua: 00:08:06

someone might be struggling, someone might be having a hard time, somebody

Joshua: 00:08:12

might not even know that you're suffering.

Joshua: 00:08:17

Every day, we always have a choice as to what level of confidence that

Joshua: 00:08:21

we want to project, and I know that for many of us, we have to think

Joshua: 00:08:25

about what the ramifications are if we act on some of those confidence

Joshua: 00:08:30

levels that we need to portray.

Joshua: 00:08:33

If we're able to take the confidence that we want to have and understand it in

Joshua: 00:08:38

the framework of where we're interacting with, that can create so many different

Joshua: 00:08:43

types of relationships, which in episode three I talked quite a lot about how

Joshua: 00:08:48

we can build those personal connections and be able to provide opportunities

Joshua: 00:08:52

through them if we're willing to open up where those relationships

Joshua: 00:08:56

are foundationally stabilizing in.

Joshua: 00:09:00

If you are able to have a good relationship with someone, the

Joshua: 00:09:04

confidence comes along with it.

Joshua: 00:09:07

Now, I know what you're asking me right now, my fellow listeners.

Joshua: 00:09:11

Josh, that sounds great; I have great relationships with people already.

Joshua: 00:09:16

The confidence is not a problem; what I struggle with is with the people that

Joshua: 00:09:19

are in front of me, the people that don't know me, the people that have no

Joshua: 00:09:24

idea what I've been through in my life.

Joshua: 00:09:27

How can I ever project confidence to somebody that might be judging me,

Joshua: 00:09:31

that might be causing me to make me feel like I'm insecure, maybe even

Joshua: 00:09:36

judging me and being cocky with the level of confidence that I have?

Joshua: 00:09:41

It's all about understanding and doing your homework.

Joshua: 00:09:46

Having a social script in which you're able to rely on so that you can develop

Joshua: 00:09:52

that sort of information for yourself and others is a great tool to be able

Joshua: 00:09:57

to work with someone and build the foundational exercises in which you

Joshua: 00:10:01

rehearse and provide clear cut responses.

Joshua: 00:10:06

Through the business, I do a lot of interview preparation and being able to

Joshua: 00:10:11

provide individuals that can create value through all the different things that

Joshua: 00:10:16

they are getting ready for when it comes to a panel of individuals judging them on

Joshua: 00:10:21

their qualifications, and it's all about just being able to understand and fulfill

Joshua: 00:10:27

what is involved with those practices.

Joshua: 00:10:30

Now, those practices can be very tough.

Joshua: 00:10:32

They also can create a lot of different things for us that might

Joshua: 00:10:36

be troubling, it might be hardships, it might be something that we have

Joshua: 00:10:40

to just get ready to feel comfortable about being uncomfortable with others.

Joshua: 00:10:45

But isn't that what we're trying to do?

Joshua: 00:10:48

Aren't we just providing confidence through the meticulous practice, over and

Joshua: 00:10:54

over and over again, creating that value within ourselves, knowing that we can

Joshua: 00:10:59

build and overcome the challenges if we just have the knowledge and the skillsets?

Joshua: 00:11:06

What would it look like if we were able to showcase the best versions

Joshua: 00:11:10

of ourselves by pursuing the things that we really are passionate about?

Joshua: 00:11:15

The aspirations by overcoming some of the physical and mental challenges because

Joshua: 00:11:20

we absolutely enjoy what we're doing.

Joshua: 00:11:24

It's all about finding the passion.

Joshua: 00:11:27

Passion does not always equate to confidence, but it is a great stepping

Joshua: 00:11:33

stone for anybody that is struggling and might have had some chronic frustrations

Joshua: 00:11:38

as it relates to having confidence to start from a solid ground and build

Joshua: 00:11:43

themselves up to an ability where they are feeling loved, they are feeling

Joshua: 00:11:50

accepted, and they are feeling what that connection is with others that

Joshua: 00:11:56

they've been so desperately looking for.

Joshua: 00:12:00

It's not easy to start in that process, and it means thinking about

Joshua: 00:12:05

the things that might be struggling with you in the first place.

Joshua: 00:12:09

They might be struggling with how you are handling those sort of situations,

Joshua: 00:12:15

and as long as you're willing to practice with someone that you trust, or you

Joshua: 00:12:19

are able to practice for yourself with the acceptance of knowing that it's

Joshua: 00:12:22

going to be awkward and uncomfortable a few times, that is making progress.

Joshua: 00:12:30

Confidence does not have to be a overly complicated formula

Joshua: 00:12:33

that many people make it to be.

Joshua: 00:12:36

It takes repetition, it makes perfection happen in many different

Joshua: 00:12:41

forms and many different ways.

Joshua: 00:12:44

I know that for many of you out there that might be listening to this, you

Joshua: 00:12:48

might be thinking about where some of those areas are in your life.

Joshua: 00:12:53

Inward reflection is one of the first things that you should be

Joshua: 00:12:56

doing in order to create that value, but take it a step further.

Joshua: 00:13:01

Work with someone that's able to look at you objectively and say, these

Joshua: 00:13:06

are the things that I think you can do to help you take it to the next

Joshua: 00:13:10

level, with your level of confidence.

Joshua: 00:13:13

If you're able to do that, you're able to create a few things for yourself.

Joshua: 00:13:18

Not only does it help you with your personal relationships by combining some

Joshua: 00:13:22

of the things that might been struggles with many different combinations of

Joshua: 00:13:26

people that you have loved over the years, whether that is your mother,

Joshua: 00:13:30

your father, your significant other, maybe even siblings, but it helps

Joshua: 00:13:35

you in the professional realm because now you have a basis in which you

Joshua: 00:13:39

can create that value for others.

Joshua: 00:13:43

You can create that value in which you're sharing those unique experiences

Joshua: 00:13:47

where you're able to train and cultivate the relationships that you desperately

Joshua: 00:13:52

want to have in the workplace, and maybe even with that next customer or

Joshua: 00:13:57

in that next sales lead that you have.

Joshua: 00:14:00

If you're able to do that, you are going to be shown as a warrior of confidence.

Joshua: 00:14:06

You're going to have a feeling of euphoria inside of you, knowing that no matter

Joshua: 00:14:10

what, you will be accepted, but you also have to put the brakes on when you

Joshua: 00:14:17

know that it might be a little too much.

Joshua: 00:14:21

When people are starting to look at you and saying, "is that really

Joshua: 00:14:25

the person that I got to know?"

Joshua: 00:14:28

Authenticity in confidence is something that we will talk about

Joshua: 00:14:33

in future episodes, but for now, I will share with you this hint.

Joshua: 00:14:39

If you are able to be your authentic self by examining where are some of

Joshua: 00:14:43

those barriers that you're putting up in front of you, not only are you going

Joshua: 00:14:47

to only be creating some value for not only yourself, but you're also going

Joshua: 00:14:52

to be helping others to see the best version of yourself and the best version

Joshua: 00:14:59

of the world that you want to live in.

Joshua: 00:15:02

It's not just all about propaganda.

Joshua: 00:15:05

It's not all just about the things that we're interacting with in this world.

Joshua: 00:15:09

It's about the ways in which we are transforming ourselves on a daily

Joshua: 00:15:13

basis, and if you can use confidence to take that next step forward,

Joshua: 00:15:19

relationships can help you bring out the very best in you in that field.

Joshua: 00:15:26

Nothing is impossible if you believe in the confidence

Joshua: 00:15:30

that you have yet to unlock.

Joshua: 00:15:35

Thanks for listening to episode five of Speaking From the Heart,

Joshua: 00:15:38

and I look forward to hearing from your heart very soon.

Outro: 00:15:43

Thanks for listening.

Outro: 00:15:44

For more information about our podcast and future shows, search for Speaking From

Outro: 00:15:48

The Heart to subscribe and be notified wherever you listen to your podcasts.

Outro: 00:15:53

Visit us at www.yourspeakingvoice.biz for more information about potential

Outro: 00:16:00

services that can help you create the best version of yourself.