Episode #106 - Start Living & Start Doing: An Interview With Juanita Gaynor

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Welcome to the podcast where relationships, confidence, and

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determination all converge into

an amazing, heartfelt experience.

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This is Speaking From The Heart.

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Joshua: Welcome back to episode

number 106 of Speaking from the Heart.

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Today we have Juanita Gaynor with

us, and Juanita is a triumphant

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success mindset coach, empowerment

speaker, and accomplished entrepreneur

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hailing from New Jersey, right next

to me here in Pennsylvania, and has

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risen above the shadows of childhood

trauma, emerging even stronger.

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Armed with degrees in business

administration and accounting, she

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leads five thriving ventures such as

EABJ Consulting and Event Management,

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Elite Financial Management, Restored

2 Life Ministries, Stella Publications

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LLC, and Stella Notary Services.

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Beyond her entrepreneurial proudness,

Juanita is a versatile artist with

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a flair for music and culinary arts.

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She hosts the Moving Past Your Radio

Show and co-authored empowering books

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like I Am Who God Says I Am, 100 Words

of Inspiration, and When a Woman Prays.

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Juanita's life mission is to

shine as a beacon of purpose,

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attributing her achievements to

unwavering faith and an open heart.

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With global expansion plans for her

enterprises, she's poised to continue

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her inspiring journey, leaving a positive

mark on the world, and I have to say

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with our conversation that we have today,

she leaves not just a positive mark, not

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only the things that she's achieving,

not only rubbed off on me being an

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entrepreneur starting out myself, but

I think you'll find that the backstory

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that Juanita brings is not only one

of strength, but also determination,

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one of the values of even my business

for that matter, that push us forward.

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It allows us to grow and not be held back

anymore from the undeniable opportunities

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that we have, not only to leave a mark on

this world, not only to help others, but

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you'll see with Juanita and what she's all

about, that it makes such a big difference

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in being able to overcome all the traumas

that might ever face us in our lives.

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But with that, let's go to the episode.

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All right.

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We're here with Juanita Gaynor.

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Juanita, thanks for sharing

your heart with us today.

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Hey, how are you?

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Juanita: I'm doing well.

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How are you?

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Joshua: I am doing swell and I

really am excited that you're

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a part of the show today.

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One of the coolest things about you that

I haven't had on the show yet is just

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because of the things that I had just

introduced the audience to about you is

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that you have a unique story in itself,

but before we get into that, I really want

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to talk a little bit about your background

and what caught my eye right away,

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knowing that I have two master's degrees

myself, I have business administration

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and public administration, but I noticed

you have your degrees in business

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administration, woohoo, and accounting.

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Can you talk a little bit about what

got you into education to learn a little

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bit before you started going into this

impressive career stance that you've had?

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Juanita: Absolutely.

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I have been always an avid learner.

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Even as I was younger, I was what they

was considered very bright, so they had

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to do a lot to keep me with attention and

keep going and things, and so I remember

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when I was about, say about nine or 10,

I was living with my aunt in Boston and

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she had property, so I was her accountant.

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I would collect the rent, I would keep

the ledgers and things, and just making

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sure bills or expenses, anything that

had to do with any of the properties, I

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was the manager of it at nine, and so,

I said, "Hey, I can make money doing

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this.", but I wasn't a school person.

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I didn't like how people told

me what to do, so I always knew

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I would be an entrepreneur.

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In my senior year I was

working for, Bear Stearns.

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Bear Stearns doesn't exist in the

state that we know it, and I remember

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one of my mentors said, "I want you

to go to school to get your degree."

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He said, "You may not need it right

now, but you may in the future and

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it will open up additional doors."

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I was like, "Okay.

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Fine.", but I didn't.

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I waited It was like three or four

years before I got my first degree

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because I wanted to open a business

and I was going for a business

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loan, and the banker, he was great.

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He gave me great new information, he says,

"But I want you to do this: go to school."

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He says.

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"Even if you get your associates, it

will carry you very far, and it will

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open doors for you more so than just a

high school diploma.", and he was right.

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I got into companies.

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I have worked for some of the

largest fortune 500 companies.

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I worked for CableVision.

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Now, CableVision was what Xfinity is now-

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Joshua: Yeah.

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Juanita: So I was on the team

that was working on the transition

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and the buyout when CableVision

was bought out to become Comcast.

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Joshua: Wow, and CableVision was

like, it, like you wanted to be

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there, and I remember that growing

up, like I always like, "CableVision.

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What is that?"

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Yeah.

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Juanita: I worked for NyNex, which

was a part of the "baby bells.",

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so one of the original "baby bells"

that is now, of course, Verizon,

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so a switch over to Bell Atlantic.

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Worked for Bear Stearns; worked for

Liberty Mutual; worked for Sunoco.

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These are the doors that education

had opened for me, and it

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gave me a sense of structure.

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It gave me a sense of how things worked

in, so when I started my own businesses

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and was working and had employees myself

at the height of my event management

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company, I knew what expenses to put in.

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I knew how to treat my employees, I knew

what to include with that; how to deal

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with clients; how to make sure that bills

was paid, how to deal with state and local

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government when it came to ordinances

and permits and things like that.

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I was able to use the degree not only

to get connections, but to see the

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actual textbook in working order.

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Joshua: With that much that you've done

to be able to see that bigger picture,

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there has to be something that drove

you, Juanita, to really work hard.

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I'm wondering if you could tell us a

little bit about your childhood because

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there is always those roots that makes us

become stronger and maybe even motivate us

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to become the best versions of ourselves,

which I consistently talk about.

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Juanita: Right, so as a child,

I am a survivor of childhood,

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sexual and physical abuse.

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At the age of six, my mother was

a heroin addict and at the age

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of five, six, she started using

me as her currency for her drugs.

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Joshua: Oh my God.

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Juanita: So that is where the abuse

came in, and then she was also very

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physically abusive, so that continued

on until she had left us at a friend's

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house one day and then her mom found us

and that's how we ended up in Boston.

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For the sexual abuse,

you get into the church.

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Let's not even get into the church.

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Joshua: Yeah, that's a

big topic in itself, but-

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Juanita: It's a big topic.

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Joshua: I understand what

you're talking about there-

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Juanita: So a lot of additional abuse

carried on until one day I just was tired

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of it and I threatened to start talking

and telling people so it stopped, and the

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problem for me was, is like, not having

control of situations; not being able to

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tell people to stop, and I remember there

was an episode of Oprah that was talking

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about childhood abuse and sexual abuse,

whatever, and when they were going and

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people were talking against it, and I'm

like, "What do you mean?", because this

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was an everyday occurrence in my life

for many, many years, so I didn't know

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it wasn't normal, so you're listening

to these famous people say that it's

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not normal, that things shouldn't happen

to you, now my identity is questioned.

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Who am I?

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What am I doing?

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I didn't deal with it immediately.

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I was at that time modeling and I was

doing event management with a girlfriend

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of mine's and I decided, "You know what?

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I'll just start a business.", and

my event management company is

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what I call a trauma business,

because I could control the outcome.

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When you look at any type, not all event

planners, but most of us come from a

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life of trauma, and when you look at

these perfectly curated events that goes

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off without a hitch, that the client

doesn't know that there's hiccups, that

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is because that's situations we can

control to within a minute millisecond.

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We pull the shots.

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We call the shots, and no

one else can tell us not to.

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The people who are reporting to us,

you do as we say or you can get the

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step in, and that is where a lot of

my keeping it maintained, because

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I could control everything that's

going on and so I'm like, "Okay.

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Fine.", and I did that for a long

time, but I still wasn't happy.

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Joshua: Yeah.

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Juanita: Then, I had a graphic design

company for a while and I was great with

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that and doing a lot of work with the

ministry and I wasn't happy with that,

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and so I let that one fall off, but the

event management company, I would get

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back to it, and when I moved to Georgia

finally and started therapy, I no longer

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wanted to do the event management anymore,

and I didn't understand why at the time,

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so, fast forward to the accounting firm.

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That came out of just basic,

everything I did had to do with money.

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As I've gone through this initial stage

of healing, I was working with other

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women and other small businesses who

wasn't having great, foundational bases,

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and they didn't have the money, per se,

to go to the big five accounting firms,

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or find reputable accountants, or really

could speak to them in the language in

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which they understand, and that is how

the accounting company came about to help

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small businesses get greater foundations

and stop being audited and sued-

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Joshua: Yeah.

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Juanita: Cause I don't

like problems with the IRS.

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Me and the IRS are friends.

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Joshua: Yes.

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We are all friends here, right

Internal Revenue Service?

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Do you hear me?

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Juanita and I are friends.

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Juanita: I don't, I don't do, I don't

like anybody, cause my theory is

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is that once you get involved with

them, they never leave you alone,

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so just do it right the first time.

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Joshua: Which I find it funny you

just mentioning that, which I have

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this follow up because as you were

even sharing where all these business

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ideas came from, there's just this

one critical point that made me think.

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Is it because you were starting

these businesses that you really

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wanted to make a difference with

other people so that they didn't have

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to go through the same things that

you were going through growing up?

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Was that your motivation

or was it something more?

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Juanita: That was one of the motivations.

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That was the ultimate motivation

for me, because, again, I

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could control that feeling.

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Joshua: Hmm.

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Juanita: You know.

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Even though I hadn't gone through that

full healing process, I knew that if I'm

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doing this, when you're doing somebody's

event, you're making a dream happen.

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You are bringing to life a dream

of a little girl who's had,

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since she was a little girl.

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When you do that 50th birthday party,

you're giving someone something that they

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may have never thought they would have.

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You're helping their children give them

something that they may have never had.

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When you're doing corporate events

or whatever, you're helping the

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employers do something for their

employees, so it's always about helping

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something on some level, even in all

of the other businesses, it's making

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sure that somebody's whole, and the

thing is, we're trying to make other

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people whole because we're not whole.

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We think we'll feel better

by making other people whole.

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Joshua: Yeah.

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That is so deep because putting

myself into other people's

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shoes might be like, "No!

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You shouldn't do that.", and there's a

lot of culture behind that that says,

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"Well, I'm trying to build myself.

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You need to stay out of this!", but what

I think some people forget is that we need

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to build upon some of the other things

that other people have done, because they

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have been doing something really good,

and it doesn't mean that you can't ask for

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help, and sometimes asking for help is the

most vulnerable thing in itself to be able

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to get to that point, and I know that's

not exactly what you're saying, but-

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Juanita: No.

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It is.

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Joshua: The bigger- yeah.

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Well.

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Yeah.

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Oh, great.

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Well, I'm glad we're on the same

page, Juanita, because I was

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worried for a second, like, "Yeah.

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Am I on the same page with-

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Juanita: You are.

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Joshua: "Building what I want to

build with you, or even somebody

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else", because we were literally just

talking about this, because in your

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style of working with other people,

you're getting into the trauma.

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You're getting into what they have

been through, and my sort of style is

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finishing, and that's really helping

people get to where they want to achieve

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with their goals after they get through

a lot of this things, which doesn't mean

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though that we're not done processing what

some of the scenes up because those can

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matriculate above the surface, so, going

into what you do if you're consulting.

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Tell us a little bit about what

drives you every day to help someone

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see that opportunity in themselves.

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I always like to call it the best

version of themselves because I think

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that we all have that capability inside

of our hearts to be able to be the best

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version of who we are, but I don't know.

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I always find it interesting that people

have different perspectives, especially

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that are on the show, and I'm curious

what your perspective is on that.

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Juanita: My perspective with my consulting

and coaching company; my perspective

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is that I want people to actually

dig down and identify what really is

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the problem that's holding them back.

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What's holding them back

from asking for the raise?

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What's holding them back for getting

to the next level, and it's always

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surrounded about success and money,

if you really think about it.

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Trauma always affects those, and I was

able to help people, especially women,

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identify what those were when I was

able to identify what they were for me.

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When it came to success, I remember

I was in the third or fourth grade

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and I used to have this book that I

used to sketch and different designs

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and dresses and things like that.

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I used to sketch really great, and I

remember the teacher got upset with me

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or whatever, and she literally ripped my

book up, and she threw it in the trash.

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Joshua: Oh my gosh.

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Juanita: And, I never sketched again.

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I've never sketched, and what that

taught me at that time is that

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success was never supposed to be mine.

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I was only supposed to go to a certain

level, and if I went beyond that

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certain level, somebody was going to

snatch it away and take it away, and

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then it's like Candyland, and you're

back to the beginning, and when I think

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about money, and actually charging

what I was worth and making sure I did

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that, what used to happen is because

I came from a trauma environment,

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my money was always someone else's.

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It was never my own, so I would only make

enough just to cover the bare minimum.

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I would never go any higher, because

knowing if I went any higher, then people

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would have their hands out for more, and

so once I've identified that and realized

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that that was why I didn't reach the

stars, that was why that even though I

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have successful businesses, they should

be 10 times more successful, or making

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10 times as more, than what they're

doing right now, and I identified that.

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I realized that there's a ton of people

who are having those exact same issues,

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but some of them don't understand why

they can't go in and say, "Listen.

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I want the $20,000 raise, or

I'm going over to ABC company

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because they're giving it to me."

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They're willing to stay in a beaten

down position, and that's because they

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haven't identified that trauma that

happened that made them believe that they

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couldn't ask for no more, that they were

only limited to what they were getting.

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Joshua: Do you think people hold back

from getting that extra raise, or maybe

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even achieving that business that they

always wanted to open, or even get into

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a venture that they never thought they

could not do, because of trauma, or

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maybe because of some sort of thought

that was deeply seated when they were a

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child and they just never acted on it,

or do you think it's something more than

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that, that you have seen in your clients?

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Juanita: Well, trauma presents

in different ways, and I know

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when people think about trauma,

they think about physical.

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That's the first thing that they go to.

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A lot of trauma that happens with young

people, especially children, is emotional.

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I'll give an example.

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If mommy and daddy, all they ever do

is work and they never pay you any

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attention, they never give you any time.

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You have now created a correlation, a

bad correlation, between success, getting

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success and getting attention, so your

thing is like, "I'm never going to

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climb that high in the company, because

I'm going to neglect my children, and

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I don't want to neglect my children."

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It doesn't matter what you want to achieve

or if they want to, you're hunted by that

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because all you've ever seen aligned with

that success is abandonment; is neglect,

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and parents don't do it intentionally.

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They're trying to make ends meet, but

as a child, that's what you see, and

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so they're carrying that emotional

trauma and they never speak it because

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they don't know what it is, or the

child who sees their parents, they may

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have money, but they never spend it.

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They never do anything with it.

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They're extremely hardcore.

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They don't do anything, whatever, so you

programming yourself like, "Well, what's

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the point of making all that money?

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I can't use it anyway, so why do I need

to ask?", and so, a lot of those times,

292

: 00:18:31

a lot of the traumas are emotional and

mental traumas that happen throughout

293

: 00:18:36

the course of their life, even watching

another family do better than you, cause

294

: 00:18:43

now you feel that you've been left out

of the loop or something and that you

295

: 00:18:48

must not be good enough, or your family

must not be good enough, to obtain

296

: 00:18:52

what your friend's family has, so now

you feel inadequate not realizing that

297

: 00:18:57

y'all are on two different paths, and

there's two different educations and

298

: 00:19:01

you know, this is where they're going.

299

: 00:19:02

You don't know if it was an

inheritance from the grandfather.

300

: 00:19:05

You don't know if they're coming

in on old money or new money.

301

: 00:19:08

As children, we don't know that and that

is the benefit of communication with

302

: 00:19:13

your children about life and what goes on

and what goes into it, so we take those

303

: 00:19:18

traumas, and we carried on in adulthood

and the minute they want to give you

304

: 00:19:22

that promotion, you're like, "Yeah.

305

: 00:19:23

Nah.

306

: 00:19:24

Nah.

307

: 00:19:24

Nah.", because then, that means, I'm

going to have to abandon somebody.

308

: 00:19:28

That means I'm going to have to neglect

something and I don't want to do that.

309

: 00:19:32

Joshua: It's almost like we overcompensate

because we don't want to let someone else

310

: 00:19:36

down, and I can relate to that so much

because I felt like, for most of my life,

311

: 00:19:43

I always was trying to please someone

else, to help them with their dream or

312

: 00:19:47

their journey, to get to somewhere that

they wanted to be, but I was left in

313

: 00:19:51

the dust, and I sort of felt that way

sometimes, and I know that some of it

314

: 00:19:55

was probably manufactured because of some

of those beliefs or some of those trauma

315

: 00:20:00

memories that I had, but I think that we

often have to look at the bigger picture

316

: 00:20:05

too of how does this intersect with what

our reality is of what we're trying to

317

: 00:20:11

do in the world, if it's a good thing?

318

: 00:20:14

Whether it might be something that needs

some fine tuning, especially, I know I

319

: 00:20:18

can get off the tracks real quick too,

and I need to get back on track as well,

320

: 00:20:22

so, I think there's so much opportunity

with what you just said, that people

321

: 00:20:28

often don't give themselves the love

and grace to be able to do and start.

322

: 00:20:33

Juanita, I love the fact

that you're an author.

323

: 00:20:35

I love authors because they have written

on a variety of different perspectives,

324

: 00:20:39

so let me run through the list again

for my listeners so that they know.

325

: 00:20:43

You've written some books that

you've co-authored, which include:

326

: 00:20:47

I Am Who God Says I Am, 100 Words of

Inspiration, and When A Woman Prays.

327

: 00:20:53

I always ask when I have somebody

that has written multiple books:

328

: 00:20:56

Which one's your favorite, and why?

329

: 00:20:59

Juanita: My favorite one

is I Am Who God Says I Am.

330

: 00:21:03

It was a collaboration of women.

331

: 00:21:07

We had some men, but they fell off, but

what it was is that mines was restored,

332

: 00:21:13

and so when I was just writing about the

traumas and things that I had in my life,

333

: 00:21:18

I remember saying that, "I'm restored."

334

: 00:21:21

It wasn't that I'm a survivor, that I'm

living in this, I'm restored completely

335

: 00:21:26

to what God wanted me to be and to

who I am, and there was so many moving

336

: 00:21:33

stories within that anthology, but I

realized how important it was to tell my

337

: 00:21:40

story, because I got so much feedback.

338

: 00:21:44

People were just crying

like, "Oh my goodness.

339

: 00:21:45

We didn't know this about you, but

you could never tell you've gone

340

: 00:21:49

through that.", and that let me

know that I have to continue on

341

: 00:21:55

with doing it like I am going to be.

342

: 00:21:57

My book should be out in December

because that's been a journey.

343

: 00:22:00

It's called Beyond Broken, Beyond Healed:

moving Past The Pain Into Your Destiny,

344

: 00:22:06

and I've been stuck on a chapter that I

had been unable to write for a long time,

345

: 00:22:13

and when I was finally able to start

doing that, God was saying I had not fully

346

: 00:22:18

forgiven my ex-husband, and it was true.

347

: 00:22:23

I was still harboring that resentment,

so it was amazing that I had accomplished

348

: 00:22:27

all these things, but the one thing that

I couldn't do was because I was still

349

: 00:22:31

holding on to a point in my marriage, and

holding on to that hostility toward him.

350

: 00:22:41

He's doing whatever he wants.

351

: 00:22:42

He's not necessarily successful

at it, but it was holding me back

352

: 00:22:48

from getting this book out and

I'm like, "Why can't I get it?

353

: 00:22:51

I've done all this stuff and I've gone

through all the healing.", because I was

354

: 00:22:54

still harboring resentment towards him,

so I want you listeners to know that even

355

: 00:23:00

in our healing process we can have moved

through past certain things, but there's

356

: 00:23:05

still some things that could be still

holding us back because we keep holding

357

: 00:23:09

on to it, because, a lot of the times, we

would rather hold on to the pain, instead

358

: 00:23:17

of letting it go and becoming something

new, because, see, we're used to the pain.

359

: 00:23:20

We know what that feels like.

360

: 00:23:21

We know what that looks like.

361

: 00:23:23

We don't know what the new person becomes.

362

: 00:23:27

Joshua: Man, were you supposed to be

on episode 106, because you definitely

363

: 00:23:30

have been on episode 106, because I

was literally just thinking about this

364

: 00:23:34

earlier today as the day that which

we're recording this for my listeners,

365

: 00:23:39

which now will be several months in

the future, but I was just thinking

366

: 00:23:42

about this because I'm like, "Yeah.

367

: 00:23:45

I got a lot of warm squishy stuff

that I need to get out because I've

368

: 00:23:48

been so comfortable with it, and a

lot of involves pain.", but yeah,

369

: 00:23:51

I'd like to go back to it because

that's just what I'm attracted to.

370

: 00:23:55

You're so right.

371

: 00:23:56

We have that magnetism towards it, but

that's not what we should be living

372

: 00:24:00

in, because that's not allowing us to

live in that bigger worldview of what

373

: 00:24:05

we are trying to create, and so that's

what makes this conversation interesting

374

: 00:24:10

for me, Juanita, is you've done all

these things, and you've written all

375

: 00:24:14

these things to help other people out.

376

: 00:24:17

What pushes you to just keep going,

because anybody that has been through

377

: 00:24:22

your situation, especially with

sexual abuse, would easily say, "Yep.

378

: 00:24:27

You're right, world.

379

: 00:24:28

I got to give up.", but,

you keep pushing forward.

380

: 00:24:31

It's almost like sometimes I even say to

myself, "There's something driving me."

381

: 00:24:35

I don't know what it is.

382

: 00:24:36

It's something that I can't explain, but

it keeps pushing me forward, and I've had

383

: 00:24:40

a lot of different answers on this show.

384

: 00:24:42

It was God.

385

: 00:24:43

It was paganism.

386

: 00:24:45

There was all kinds of different

things that have been expressed.

387

: 00:24:47

What is it for you, when you live

through this, that you really want

388

: 00:24:51

people to get out of Juanita that

has helped you to become this person

389

: 00:24:57

that's just going to continue being a

powerhouse now and even in the future?

390

: 00:25:02

Juanita: Right, so,

I'm going to be honest.

391

: 00:25:04

God is always the top of everything,

but the insight that he has given

392

: 00:25:09

me for my journey is so that

someone knows that they can do this.

393

: 00:25:20

It doesn't matter what it is.

394

: 00:25:23

Someone's watching you

and you don't know it.

395

: 00:25:26

They're looking at you to see how

you come out of the situation.

396

: 00:25:29

They're looking at you

to see how you respond.

397

: 00:25:32

They're looking at you to see how you

serve others even in, sometimes, the

398

: 00:25:38

height of the pain, because I think

people realize or think that once

399

: 00:25:43

you've gone through counseling and once

you've got through a certain healing,

400

: 00:25:46

you're never going to be through pain.

401

: 00:25:48

I'm sorry.

402

: 00:25:49

Their trauma didn't happen

overnight, so the healing isn't

403

: 00:25:53

going to happen overnight.

404

: 00:25:55

There's going to be things that

re-trigger, and what I say about things

405

: 00:25:58

that are re-triggering, what that lets

you know is that you're still here.

406

: 00:26:03

You're on the other side, and I would

tell somebody, "I would rather be on

407

: 00:26:07

this side of the pain and feel it, than

it'll be on the other side and not here."

408

: 00:26:14

Joshua: Mmm.

409

: 00:26:16

Wow.

410

: 00:26:17

Juanita: Because in feeling it, it

lets me know that I'm still here.

411

: 00:26:20

It lets me know that there's still

some more work to do, but it also means

412

: 00:26:25

somebody else is going through it so now I

can push; I have more of an incentive now

413

: 00:26:30

to push to find out what is the core of it

so that I can get through it a little bit

414

: 00:26:35

quicker than when we do the initial ones

we spent, we did it a couple of years.

415

: 00:26:39

Now I have more of an incentive to

be like, "Let me call my therapist.

416

: 00:26:43

Let me get to the root of this now.",

because someone's watching and someone

417

: 00:26:48

needs this healing now because when I

was young and I'm Gen X, I'm a Gen X er.

418

: 00:26:54

We didn't have the

access to mental health.

419

: 00:26:57

We didn't have the access.

420

: 00:26:59

We didn't talk about this.

421

: 00:27:00

There was no talking about

what was going on in your home.

422

: 00:27:02

There was no talking

about what's going on.

423

: 00:27:04

We didn't have emotions.

424

: 00:27:05

They ran commercials that asked

the parents, "Do you know where

425

: 00:27:08

your children are?", or, "Have

you hugged your children today?"

426

: 00:27:10

There was real commercials on television

to do this for parents, and so the

427

: 00:27:16

younger generation, you guys have access

to that, and what that does for us,

428

: 00:27:23

it means we can dilly dally and play

around when it's time for us to go into

429

: 00:27:28

the healing mode, because the younger

generation is ready for that healing.

430

: 00:27:34

They know it's there and it's time for

us to impart our wisdom, so that's what

431

: 00:27:39

keeps me going, because if they can

see me transparent, healed and whole

432

: 00:27:46

and working through and even when I

don't feel like it sometimes, and they

433

: 00:27:50

can see me operate that and they see

that I have businesses that are worth

434

: 00:27:54

a million dollars and I have books

that are going out and I'm speaking

435

: 00:27:58

in spite of what happened in my past.

436

: 00:28:01

In spite of the mistakes that

I've made, I've still ascended.

437

: 00:28:05

They're going to know that, you

know what, I may have made this one

438

: 00:28:08

mistake, or I may have had this one

thing, I can still go on and continue.

439

: 00:28:12

I don't have to wallow in the

pity of it because I'm seeing

440

: 00:28:17

how someone has come out.

441

: 00:28:21

Joshua: Heh.

442

: 00:28:22

First off, there's a lot

of deep things right there.

443

: 00:28:25

There's a lot of truth bombs that you

just put on the floor, and they're

444

: 00:28:28

not exploding because some people

need to take a look at the circuitry

445

: 00:28:32

and make sure they actually do work

before they drop them, but, wow!

446

: 00:28:37

I think you're so right because for many

of us, we want to wallow in what has

447

: 00:28:42

been the past versions of ourselves,

but we're not the past anymore.

448

: 00:28:45

We're in the present and we got to keep

moving with time even into the future, and

449

: 00:28:50

I think that even for me, this is a hard

conversation to have in my mindset that

450

: 00:28:55

I'm having at this very moment, because I

have to think about the fact that, "Wow!

451

: 00:28:59

There are things that I need to

transform", and that means an ongoing

452

: 00:29:03

process of wanting to move that needle

forward, so, Juanita, with all that

453

: 00:29:08

said, I have this last question for

you because we're almost out of time,

454

: 00:29:11

and it's something that you had said in

your bio that I've already said to the

455

: 00:29:15

listeners, but I want to read it again.

456

: 00:29:18

You said this when you submitted

this to be part of our show.

457

: 00:29:22

You said, "With global expansion

plans for enterprises, she's poised

458

: 00:29:25

to continue her inspiring journey,

leaving a positive mark on the

459

: 00:29:29

world.", so my question to you is this.

460

: 00:29:33

Did Juanita leave a positive mark

on the world, or is there still

461

: 00:29:37

more work to be done by Juanita?

462

: 00:29:39

Juanita: Oh, there's still more work.

463

: 00:29:42

There's still more work.

464

: 00:29:45

I want anyone who has

gone through anything.

465

: 00:29:48

I don't care what it is to

be like, "You know what?

466

: 00:29:51

I can make it today.

467

: 00:29:52

I can have this business."

468

: 00:29:55

Yeah, I may have created it in

trauma, but I can make it a global

469

: 00:30:00

business and help others with it.

470

: 00:30:03

I know that I can get through anything

because she laid the blueprint, because

471

: 00:30:09

she was transparent in everything

that was going on with her life.

472

: 00:30:13

She didn't hold back.

473

: 00:30:16

I still got more to lay out there.

474

: 00:30:19

Joshua: I love it.

475

: 00:30:20

You got that sass, too, like, what?

476

: 00:30:22

You think I'm done?

477

: 00:30:23

No way, and I love that because I think

we need to have that push and especially

478

: 00:30:30

hearing from someone like you that has

continued to push that needle forward is

479

: 00:30:34

really an important aspect of getting not

only the motivation, but also the positive

480

: 00:30:40

creativity, even if we're drawing it in

our little sketchbooks that get taken away

481

: 00:30:43

from us, to be able to go back and get a

new sketchbook, and just keep on drawing.

482

: 00:30:48

Juanita, I want to give

you the last few moments.

483

: 00:30:50

How could people reach out to you?

484

: 00:30:52

I know we really didn't dive much

into the four businesses overall

485

: 00:30:55

that you have, but I know there's

even more that you're working on.

486

: 00:30:58

If people are interested in checking

out more about you and who you

487

: 00:31:01

are, where could they reach out?

488

: 00:31:03

Where can they contact you?

489

: 00:31:04

I'm going to give you the last

few moments to go ahead and

490

: 00:31:06

share that with our listeners.

491

: 00:31:08

Juanita: Sure.

492

: 00:31:08

They can reach out to me on my

website, which is juanitaegaynor.com.

493

: 00:31:14

You can also reach out to me

on all aspects of social media

494

: 00:31:18

at the hashtag @JuanitaEgaynor.

495

: 00:31:21

We're talking Snapchat,

YouTube; all of them.

496

: 00:31:23

If you put that in, you're going

to find me on all of the major

497

: 00:31:26

social media platforms as well.

498

: 00:31:29

I think my pride and joy

is my podcast radio show.

499

: 00:31:33

It's called Moving Past You, and again,

we have these conversations, so you

500

: 00:31:37

can always go to movingpastyou.com

and check that out as well.

501

: 00:31:42

The most important for me is my coaching.

502

: 00:31:44

It's the coaching and helping people break

these trauma bonds so that they can live

503

: 00:31:49

their most best life, and we're working on

our masterclass, which is called Transform

504

: 00:31:56

Success Mindset Mastery; transforming fear

into fuel for success, and that is going

505

: 00:32:02

to be launching probably in the summer.

506

: 00:32:06

Your listeners; I'll provide a nice

little package for them so they can

507

: 00:32:10

get a nice discount on that, because

I feel that sometimes we think fear

508

: 00:32:14

is bad and it's not always bad.

509

: 00:32:17

It's fuel is what you build foundations

with; is what you change the world with.

510

: 00:32:24

You don't let it stop you.

511

: 00:32:25

You let it propel you, so

juanitaegaynor.com is where you

512

: 00:32:30

can reach me for everything, and

you can see about the different

513

: 00:32:33

businesses, or even on LinkedIn.

514

: 00:32:34

I think I have everything

linked on LinkedIn.

515

: 00:32:36

You can find everything on LinkedIn.

516

: 00:32:38

LinkedIn is the hot spot,

but yeah; just reach out.

517

: 00:32:41

If there's questions, want

to connect, definitely.

518

: 00:32:45

Joshua: Awesome.

519

: 00:32:46

I'll put all that in the

episode notes for my listeners.

520

: 00:32:49

They want to go check it out and it

sounds like there might be a little bit

521

: 00:32:52

of a special if you mentioned Speaking

From The Heart when you register, you

522

: 00:32:55

might get a little bit of a discount

with that, so thank you Juanita for

523

: 00:32:59

gifting my listeners that as well,

but I want to tell you, this has been

524

: 00:33:05

eyeopening conversation for me because

of what you've been through, but there's

525

: 00:33:09

something that you said that I never

even thought about with my own business

526

: 00:33:12

that I want to close with is that we

both have something that I never thought

527

: 00:33:17

we would have in common until tonight,

which is we both have trauma businesses,

528

: 00:33:21

but we don't let the trauma from those

businesses or even from our life put us

529

: 00:33:26

down, make us feel like outcasts, don't

make us feel dejected, don't make us feel

530

: 00:33:32

any sort of negative emotion or energy.

531

: 00:33:35

I think that for all that, you definitely

are continuing to build something that

532

: 00:33:40

I'm impressed by just from looking at

from a distance, and from a millennial to

533

: 00:33:45

the Gen Xers out there, I will say this,

that we all have something in common,

534

: 00:33:50

and I think that no matter what your

generational differences, I think you can

535

: 00:33:54

learn a lot from this conversation, and

for all those reasons, Juanita, thanks so

536

: 00:33:59

much for being on Speaking From The Heart.

537

: 00:34:01

Thank you for sharing

your heart with us today.

538

: 00:34:03

I was really privileged to hear this,

along with my listeners as well.

539

: 00:34:06

Juanita: You're so welcome.

540

: 00:34:07

I appreciate you for having me.

541

: 00:34:10

Joshua: I want to thank Juanita again

so much for being part of the show and

542

: 00:34:14

just sharing so many amazing tidbits

for us because if you think about it,

543

: 00:34:19

how we able to grow starts with not

just our family, not just with all the

544

: 00:34:24

things that we're learning to be able

to become better as an entrepreneur,

545

: 00:34:29

but it's about learning new skills.

546

: 00:34:31

It might be even finding

a degree for that matter.

547

: 00:34:34

You might need to find the structure,

the support necessary for you to grow

548

: 00:34:39

into something that you never thought

possible, but it means that you have

549

: 00:34:42

to keep moving that needle forward.

550

: 00:34:44

It's something that I've even talked about

on variety of different shows before,

551

: 00:34:48

not only with just guests, but even some

of our monologues, but the importance

552

: 00:34:52

of understanding and growing into this

big accumulating factor, whatever that

553

: 00:34:57

means that we impact the world with

means that we have to stand behind that

554

: 00:35:01

structure, that level of commitment,

that support, that sometimes might

555

: 00:35:07

not be there when we first start out.

556

: 00:35:11

I think that we have to learn that we

have to grow, not only just with people

557

: 00:35:16

and their backstory, but we also have to

learn that the things that we have, the

558

: 00:35:21

things that we cherish, whether those

are good or bad, help us to formulate

559

: 00:35:27

the strategy in which we're able to move

forward with, and Juanita talked about

560

: 00:35:30

this so much about what she does, really

dealing with the trauma business; being

561

: 00:35:35

able to curate events, being able to

learn with other women, with other people

562

: 00:35:41

for that matter, the ability to grow.

563

: 00:35:43

The question becomes:

how are you giving back?

564

: 00:35:46

Even if it's through one small

act, maybe if it's through several

565

: 00:35:49

businesses like Juanita has with five

of them, in order to commit that one

566

: 00:35:56

absolute truth to help other people.

567

: 00:35:59

What's holding you back?

568

: 00:36:01

Why aren't you getting that raise?

569

: 00:36:02

Why aren't you doing the things

that you should be doing?

570

: 00:36:04

Are you just doing the bare

minimum just to carry through

571

: 00:36:07

life, because that's all you have?

572

: 00:36:11

I think that we often get trapped in

this thought process of wanting to always

573

: 00:36:15

do the same things over and over and

over again, thinking that it's going

574

: 00:36:18

to come up with a different result.

575

: 00:36:20

The very definition of insanity, but

what are some of the good and some of

576

: 00:36:25

the bad that we can pull from each of

those experiences, so that we're able to

577

: 00:36:28

learn and understand, and I think Juanita

touched on that quite a lot, about the

578

: 00:36:33

importance of not only those undertones

that we have, but also the ways in which

579

: 00:36:37

we can correlate, be able to grow into

places where we might not be able to

580

: 00:36:42

grow, but yet overcome at the same time.

581

: 00:36:46

How do we connect all these things?

582

: 00:36:48

How do we connect the story, this

dream of possibility that we have?

583

: 00:36:54

Well, I think for some people, getting

over your own past, your own emotional

584

: 00:37:00

and mental traumas can not only move you

from leaving that big impact, but push

585

: 00:37:07

you out of the way so that you might

not be able to succeed, and I would

586

: 00:37:12

hate, along with probably Juanita for

that matter, having that happen to you.

587

: 00:37:18

What is the best way?

588

: 00:37:20

It's always that enduring question that

we have to ask of, how do we overcome?

589

: 00:37:25

How do we stop ourselves from

seeing that sort of situation

590

: 00:37:29

play out in the first place?

591

: 00:37:32

I think that many of the books that

she's talked about, even the new one

592

: 00:37:35

that's coming out, Beyond Broken,

Beyond Healed, which will be debuting

593

: 00:37:39

sometime in December of this year,

really shows that the process might mean

594

: 00:37:45

that we have to let go of a little bit

of ourselves; those things that really

595

: 00:37:49

hold us back to achieve greatness.

596

: 00:37:54

Healing means letting go of the

things that might be not only

597

: 00:37:59

traumatic and toxic, but re-learning,

re-educating ourselves in the

598

: 00:38:04

ways in which we're able to grow.

599

: 00:38:07

The ways in which we're

able to expand our minds.

600

: 00:38:11

The ways in which we're sometimes

might be a little bit hard for us to

601

: 00:38:14

just start out with, and I think I

understand, even listening to Juanita's

602

: 00:38:19

story and why she has all these

businesses, why it's important for

603

: 00:38:23

her to keep pushing, to keep moving,

to keep seeing, and to keep learning.

604

: 00:38:32

No matter what stage of life you

are in, no matter if people have

605

: 00:38:36

long forgotten about you or are

constantly stalking you, which even

606

: 00:38:40

in itself might be a good thing.

607

: 00:38:43

Sometimes stalking is thought of as a

negative thing, but in this context,

608

: 00:38:47

if you think about the overall picture

of seeing what other people are doing,

609

: 00:38:52

you can make a big difference in your

own life, but if people are watching

610

: 00:38:57

you at the height of your pain, and

they're not doing anything about it, we

611

: 00:39:02

need to be able to learn to walk away.

612

: 00:39:05

We need to be able to hit that block

button, which I've done, even myself

613

: 00:39:09

for that matter, because I know that

those people are just looking at me

614

: 00:39:14

and wanting to strike at the right

opportunity because their negativity

615

: 00:39:19

has overtaken their positivity.

616

: 00:39:23

Even if I thought that this mindset, this

mindfulness, which some people can even

617

: 00:39:27

challenge as if whether I'm authentic

or not, could even challenge Juanita

618

: 00:39:32

in terms of whether she's authentic

or not, means that you are not happy

619

: 00:39:38

with what we're saying, and maybe it's

challenging you, but even at the same

620

: 00:39:43

time, you can challenge us, and we

might be wrong too, and that's okay.

621

: 00:39:48

We're learning and growing

all together, which is what

622

: 00:39:51

I think we continuously miss.

623

: 00:39:54

How can we feel the things that we need

to feel, and how can we hear the things

624

: 00:39:59

that we need to hear, without sacrificing

our overall ability to learn and grow?

625

: 00:40:08

We can wallow in the past all we

want, and I know that even with

626

: 00:40:12

wallowing, it also means that we

have to understand that there's

627

: 00:40:16

some grief, and it's okay to grieve.

628

: 00:40:19

It's okay to understand that the family

that we're growing, the people that

629

: 00:40:23

we're interacting with, and even the

skills that we're developing, all go

630

: 00:40:29

through ebbs and flows of our lives.

631

: 00:40:32

In other words, the things that we have

in terms of structure and support, might

632

: 00:40:37

not be there when it counts the most,

so how do we build those opportunities?

633

: 00:40:44

How do we experiment with all the

variety of different things, and unlike

634

: 00:40:49

other coaches out there that will give

you a framework for $99, or work with

635

: 00:40:54

you for $3,000 to $5,000, whether it's

something in between that or maybe

636

: 00:41:00

it's something that Juanita provides,

I want to give you my perspective.

637

: 00:41:06

Just do it.

638

: 00:41:09

Huh?

639

: 00:41:09

That's it?

640

: 00:41:10

Just do it?

641

: 00:41:11

Is that all I need to do to be

able to achieve this awesome

642

: 00:41:14

opportunity that I always wanted?

643

: 00:41:16

I just need to do it?

644

: 00:41:19

Yes.

645

: 00:41:21

When you put both feet forward, you

know that you're entering into something

646

: 00:41:26

that you might not be able to succeed.

647

: 00:41:29

You might fail, but you did it.

648

: 00:41:34

Are you really going to fail, knowing

that you did put both feet forward, and

649

: 00:41:38

you pushed that feeling of fear aside,

knowing that if you were able to do

650

: 00:41:45

all the things that you ever thought

imaginable, and you were successful,

651

: 00:41:49

that you were able to actually accomplish

it, then I think you're finishing

652

: 00:41:54

what you should have started a long

time ago, and that's what I love

653

: 00:41:57

about Juanita, she's a finisher coach!

654

: 00:41:59

She wants you to finish the job.

655

: 00:42:01

She wants you to see yourself be so

successful that she wants you to be able

656

: 00:42:07

to stand on your own two feet as well.

657

: 00:42:12

Whether you've been abused, whether you've

used drugs, whether you had something

658

: 00:42:17

else that has held you back, stop letting

it hold you back today and just do it.

659

: 00:42:24

I know it seems so simple.

660

: 00:42:26

I know that it seems so

abstract yet at the same time.

661

: 00:42:30

What am I exactly doing?

662

: 00:42:32

What am I exactly trying to achieve?

663

: 00:42:35

This is where purpose is so important,

not just the purpose of what you used

664

: 00:42:41

to do, but what you're going to do now.

665

: 00:42:45

You need to be at the height of not just

the things that you're achieving, but at

666

: 00:42:51

the height of overcoming that threshold

of pain, so that even when it feels really

667

: 00:42:56

bad, when it feels really disgusting to

walk through, and that the healing process

668

: 00:43:03

might still be going on even as you go

through this overall identity crisis, or

669

: 00:43:08

maybe even that growth spurt that you're

experiencing, just know, that people

670

: 00:43:15

like Juanita, and people like coaches,

and people that are just there that

671

: 00:43:20

genuinely care about you, will be right

behind you putting a hand on the back of

672

: 00:43:25

your shoulder, holding you up, maybe even

lifting one of your arms, one of your

673

: 00:43:31

legs, because when they're jumping up and

down, so are you, and when you're able

674

: 00:43:38

to do it on your own, you're going to be

able to do that with other people too.

675

: 00:43:43

When you're jumping up and down,

you're succeeding, and I want you to

676

: 00:43:47

finish what you started, because it's

worth it, not just for the things

677

: 00:43:52

that you have been holding back in

doing, but that you're able to get

678

: 00:43:57

away from the trauma and just do it.

679

: 00:44:02

The emotions, the mental inabilities

that you once thought that you couldn't

680

: 00:44:07

do, stop feeling them today and start

doing what your purpose is all about.

681

: 00:44:16

Thanks for listening to episode

number 106 of Speaking From the

682

: 00:44:19

Heart, and I look forward to

hearing from your heart, very soon.

683

: 00:44:25

Outro: Thanks for listening.

684

: 00:44:26

For more information about our podcast

and future shows, search for Speaking From

685

: 00:44:30

The Heart to subscribe and be notified

wherever you listen to your podcasts.

686

: 00:44:35

Visit us at www.yourspeakingvoice.biz

for more information about potential

687

: 00:44:41

services that can help you create

the best version of yourself.

688

: 00:44:46

See you next time.