Episode #165 - Believe In Yourself (Again)

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Welcome to the podcast where relationships, confidence, and

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determination all converge into

an amazing, heartfelt experience.

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This is Speaking From The Heart.

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Joshua: Welcome back to episode

number 165 of Speaking from the Heart.

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It's time to believe in yourself.

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It's time to show that no matter what

might be happening, unlocking your

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hidden potential in your heart means that

you're able to see things that oftentimes

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might not be seen by common curiosity.

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It's time to explore what is really

outside of your comfort zone and to

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show you what is really not only in

your way, but to unlock what might be.

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It's time to be able to step

forward and find your voice.

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Today's episode is not the same

as what we had just covered

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within the last several weeks.

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It's not what we had before when it came

to even understanding, even all the things

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that we got going on in our life, how we

can become better versions of ourself.

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Now, last month I did have

an episode called Believe in

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Yourself that aired October 1st.

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This time, we're going to believe in

ourselves in a completely different way.

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Now, if you did listen to that episode,

which was episode number 155, maybe

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you want to take a listen to it again.

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Maybe you might be visiting us for the

first time, and maybe you want to check

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that out, just so you have a context

for today's episode, but we talked about

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more so of how we can keep the faith on

some days over others, especially when

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it comes to manifesting that challenging

belief, that it might be holding us

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back, to create the best version, to be

able to understand that we can believe

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in ourselves, and I would have to say

that that episode really gave some

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context at the very end of how you can

create and manifest that existence no

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matter where you might be in your life.

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Today's episode is quite different.

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We really want to explore what it means to

connect with your belief in yourself, and

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what might be some of the highs and lows,

just in general for that matter, that can

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create, and even hold back, from becoming

the best version of ourself, but there's

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really one important thing that I will

talk about later on, that will help us to

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gain that clarity and confidence, but I'm

going to hold off on that because let's

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talk about what it means to even believe.

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I think that even for myself, we have

to explain why it's important to have a

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basic understanding of what believing is.

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Believing isn't necessarily worshipping.

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It's not the same thing

as accepting and trusting.

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It means that you're giving yourself

the confidence to say that, I want to

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believe that what you have to say, what

you are going to do, will come alive.

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That's why the word believe is not the

same as even putting the word trust

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in the same sentence, because those

are two different types of concepts.

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I'm sure that many of you might

be scratching your head saying,

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"Well, I've heard it said this way.

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Why isn't it the same?"

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I think that believing is actually

giving yourself permission.

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Trust in itself is an external

type of permission, in which you

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have to let somebody else in.

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You actually have to give them the credit

so that they are invited in, feeling like

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they can come out to say anything that

is on their minds, and I even had Dr.

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Lulu recently on this show, that really

talked about that concept of letting

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yourself be a radical thinker, but we're

not talking about being radical today.

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We're not even talking about understanding

what other people's perceptions are.

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We're really just talking about you.

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When's the last time that

you even sat back and thought

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about yourself in this way?

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Has it been a long time?

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Has it been since episode 155?

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Has it been something else that might

be prohibiting you from unlocking that

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potential that I know that you have,

but yet you have to acknowledge for

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yourself, and that's really the key.

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When we talk about belief,

we're talking about yourself.

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Sometimes when we are even

acknowledging that we have these sort

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of situations, what comes to mind?

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What we are able to do.

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What we are able not to do.

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Some of those aspects, some of those

things that are holding us hostage,

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can really throw us into the tiller.

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It makes us feel like we're being

grounded up, we are being questioned,

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challenged, even being viewed as somebody

that is completely different of how we

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should be perceiving even ourselves.

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Yeah.

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I know!

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Even ourselves can even

challenge ourselves!

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Now if that isn't meta, I don't

know what is, but even for me,

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I've had these meta discussions.

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I've had these types of

conversations with other people.

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It has even thrown me under the bus of

why it's so important to just think about,

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and just simplistically accept, that

you can believe in yourself, even if you

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had believed in yourself in the past.

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You see, belief isn't just

about what you might accept.

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It's about what's inside your heart

that you're willing to accept.

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Aha!

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Now we're getting to the real

depths of what this is all about.

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What is inside your heart that maybe you

haven't written down in such a long time?

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Maybe you haven't envisioned

what that looks like.

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Way back in episode 13, I

talked about the lighthouse.

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That lighthouse is what is so important

for me, that guiding principle,

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way back when I was struggling with

my suicide, when I was struggling

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with the thoughts of inadequacy.

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I did not believe in myself, ladies

and gentlemen, and that belief was

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tainted by all the different things that

were happening in my life internally.

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Sure, I've even mentioned on this show,

on a variety of different occasions

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after that, of how the external

pressures got the best of me, but that's

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not what this is always all about.

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We ultimately make a choice.

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That choice is what decides whether we are

really going to work on ourselves or not.

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If we really are afraid of

unlocking what is inside of our

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human being, our human condition,

then all of this is for nothing.

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Even as we get towards the end of this

year and we enter this very festive

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holiday season, you might be even saying

to yourself, "Can I pull this off?

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Can I make dinner for

Thanksgiving and Christmas?

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Do I have money in the bank account,

especially after being really

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traumatized, even unfortunately debt

ridden this year, because of the cost

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of everything going up to be able

to give my kids Christmas presents?

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To be able to feed everyone that

will be coming to the house?

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Do I have to take a loan from a bank?

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Will they even approve me to

be able to pay for all these

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things that I have on my plate?

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What am I going to do?"

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That last question is something that

I've always asked myself, even in

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the last 10 months, which has been

some of the most hardest moments of

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my life, trying to figure out what's

the best way to move forward, when

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I felt like nobody believed in me.

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Bonus episode number one of this

podcast really dived into why I have

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this kind of conversation today.

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That episode recorded a time in my life

in which I was really struck down by an

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unfortunate series of events by someone

that had really made me feel inadequate,

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but yet, at the same time, it was because

of something that happened externally.

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I let that get the best of me internally.

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I could have changed the narrative,

but I chose not to, and that led

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me into a spiral that I had been

dealing with, and even to this day,

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sometimes reels its ugly head, and

I have to keep on beating it down,

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knowing that it's no longer who I am.

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I think that we have to come to peace

sometimes when it comes to these types

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of situations, and peace looks like it's

different for so many different people.

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Peace in itself means that we actually

have to acknowledge that we have

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to have solemn quiet, and sometimes

that solemnness, that ability to sit

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in silence, to be able to actually

process what's happening around us,

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is something that I've really have

cherished over the last few years.

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It means actually stepping aside,

knowing that it's okay to feel

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the way that I do, but also at the

same time, I have to let myself go.

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I have to make myself feel

comfortable with all the things

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that are happening around me.

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It means that I have to feel like I am

in charge of what is ultimately going to

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happen, and sometimes being in charge is

something that really scares me to death.

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As I even run my own business and help

others become the best versions of

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themselves, me, an owner of a coaching

business that's really trying to figure

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out what's the best way to move forward,

can also struggle with this as well.

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Why would I be so open about it?

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I've talked about this on some of my

earlier episodes with some of my first

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several dozen guests about why it's so

important to keep pushing myself forward.

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How do they push themselves forward?

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I was really wrestling at that time what

it meant to have sheer confidence to

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really believe in myself again after all

these things that have transpired in my

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life, and trying to figure out where my

place is on this earth, but there was

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one thing that I wasn't considering that

today I want to share with you that might

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be helping you to overcome this limiting

belief that you have in yourself, which

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is, if there's nobody else that's standing

in your way, the only person that is left,

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that might be holding you up, is you.

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Yes.

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I'm talking about you, the person

listening to this, that might be

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holding this back from becoming,

being able to believe in yourself.

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To gain clarity and confidence, it means

that we actually have to love ourselves.

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We have to acknowledge that we have a

place on this earth, that we have gifts

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that we can give to others, that we are

able to share with no strings attached,

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that no matter what happens, regardless

of what any type of person might say or

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do, they have no power over what we have

as beating to our own drum, as even Dr.

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Lulu has said during

last month's interview.

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It's one thing to tell ourselves that

we are not going to be held back by

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other people, but it's a whole other

conversation when we say that we are the

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ones that are holding ourselves back,

and sure, you might be scratching your

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head and saying, "I don't feel that way."

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Do you really feel that way, or

are you not actually attuned to

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what you got going on in your life?

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Are you really digging deep, my

friends, into understanding why you

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feel this way, and why it continues to

keep on coming back every single time?

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Do you really believe that you feel that

way, or do you think that you haven't

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had a chance to explore it deeply?

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One of my future guests that I have on the

show, which I'm not going to tell you who

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it is, and when we get to that episode,

I think it's going to be enlightening.

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I think it has helped me to understand

that unlocking our hidden potential

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means that we have to live in a freedom

of self expression, loving ourselves,

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and finding the ways in which we can

do that objectively or subjectively.

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For me, I'm a very analytical person.

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I have to see the proof in the pudding.

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I have to see the numbers

thrown up on the board.

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I have to have that physical

manifestation, whether that's with an

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award, a trophy, a plaque, seeing it on

my dashboard on QuickBooks, or even seeing

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something else that tells me through a

validation of texting, or communication,

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or by some other means, to tell me that

I am worth it, that I am capable of

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being able to help others, to see what

their true value is, and that I am able

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to believe in myself, once and for all.

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It's weird because it's

like this pendulum.

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It goes back and forth.

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One day I feel great,

the other day I don't.

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It might be the energy that's in the air.

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It might be the atmosphere.

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It might be the seasons changing.

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It might be the stress that's coming in

our lives from a variety of different

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aspects, whether that's through our jobs.

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It's through our bosses.

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It might be the different physical

manifestations that we're having.

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It might be financial.

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It might be legal.

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It might be cultural, societal.

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It might be where we live.

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It might be where we go

to the grocery store.

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It might be with people that we

thought that we can care about,

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but we can't care about anymore.

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It might be because of an argument that we

really felt like we were winning, but then

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we lost because we took it too personally.

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Do you understand that all these things

that I've just rattled off for the last

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minute could be all the possible reasons

as to why you, the person listening

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to this, can't believe in themselves?

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You have to be curious about wanting

to change, and I can't teach you that.

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That's something that even on this

podcast, I really craved trying to figure

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out how to create this conversation

with you about being curious, but

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then I started to realize that in my

own life, when people told me that

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I needed to be curious, I refused.

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I was so set in my ways.

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I didn't want to hear anybody else's

bullshit, just like the bullshit

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that you might be thinking I'm

saying today, that I can't do this.

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I'm not worthy of doing this.

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I can't create this for anybody, but if

you want to keep standing in your way,

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that's your choice, but the curiosity

got the best of me one day a couple

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years ago, which ultimately allowed

me to rent an office in Carlisle,

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Pennsylvania, to work on what will

ultimately become Your Speaking Voice

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LLC, and then the byproduct that came

a year later, Speaking From The Heart.

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It became full circle for

me, ladies and gentlemen.

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I am starting to understand why I

need to believe in myself yet again,

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and now even when I hear myself in

episode 155 give me that final saying

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at the end, that final push it allowed

me to connect with myself in a way

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that I never connected with before.

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Me; and the me of the past will not

be the me of the present, or even the

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future, but for one infinitesimal moment,

I could believe that I had the power

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to change, and ladies and gentlemen,

that has been the purpose of why I

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always believe, even at the end of 2024,

entering into: 2025

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potential to unlock your heart to see

what might be otherwise not seen if

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you're willing to challenge yourself.

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This is your time.

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If this is your first time being

on this show, listening to this

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podcast, take a listen to all the

episodes that I've had so far.

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All 166 of them.

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This is not even counting today's episode.

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There is 166 episodes for your liking.

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You can resonate with all of them.

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You can resonate with some of them.

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You can resonate with none of them,

but that is your choice, but what I

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will challenge you in your choice of is

whether you want to be stuck in your mud,

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not willing to change, not willing to

believe in yourself again, because you

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don't see it in yourself, but yet, I see

it in you, just like I see it in myself.

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That's why I always seem to end these

shows talking about how I see it in you.

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You!

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The people that I might have never met

before in my life, I believe in you, so

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if you can empower yourself to become

the best version of yourself, you can

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gain the clarity and confidence, if

you're willing, to stop standing in

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your way today, and start challenging

those limiting beliefs, to believe in

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yourself yet again, because there will

be people that are ready for you to have

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that conversation, no matter how tough

it is, and yes, although it's external

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in nature, it's time that you face that

one ultimate person that has always been

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in your way, that has always said no,

that has never made you feel comfortable

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about what you're doing right now.

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You, and when you tackle

you, give me a call.

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I'm ready to help you become the best

version of yourself all over again.

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Thanks for listening to episode

number 165 of Speaking From the

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Heart, and I look forward to

hearing from your heart, very soon.

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Outro: Thanks for listening.

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For more information about our podcast

and future shows, search for Speaking From

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The Heart to subscribe and be notified

wherever you listen to your podcasts.

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Visit us at www.yourspeakingvoice.biz

for more information about potential

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services that can help you create

the best version of yourself.

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See you next time.